


In the Halls

by Corvus_Rex



Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-18
Updated: 2017-04-25
Packaged: 2018-05-02 05:39:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 28
Words: 31,538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5236370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Corvus_Rex/pseuds/Corvus_Rex
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>I haven't updated in ages, sorry! I've been caught up with other stuff. And these chapters move kind of slow and awkwardly to me, so I had no motivation. But here they are~</p>
          </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

               It was bright and hot and loud. All things Kanda hated. He hated listening to his foster dad fawn over him and the other kids in the house more. So here he was, lounging in a chair at the edge of the city pool watching his friends playing. He’d never admit it, but he couldn’t swim, instead he always just said he hated swimming. Thankfully, they bought it, and let him do his own thing. Daisya had, of course, made him wear a pair of swim trunks with sharks on them though. Their neighbor, Lenalee, had donated her older brother’s shirt (which he made her wear over her bikini) to Kanda, since he was uncomfortable showing his chest to anyone. Kanda yawned, leaning back in the chair, wondering if maybe he shouldn’t join them. After all, they were in the shallow end… Sighing heavily, he got up, tugging on the hem of the shirt, debating taking it off. In the end, his self-consciousness one out, and he padded to the pool edge, shirt still on.

“Oi… I’m coming in.” He stated loudly, interrupting Daisya mid-sentence.

“Ah! Kanda, buddy! Come on in, the water’s great! It won’t eat you either, I promise!” Daisya teased, grinning his lopsided grin. Marie folded his arms over his chest and nodded, smiling. Biting his tongue to keep from snapping at Daisya, Kanda slid into the cool water, biting his lip. It was colder than he expected, but he wasn’t going to back away now. Lenalee jumped up and down, clapping her hands.

“Yay! Now we have even teams, we can play waterball!” She cheered, earning a puzzled look from Kanda and an exasperated sigh from Daisya.

“Marie’s still blind, he can’t catch a ball, Lena.” Daisya said, as if they’ve had this conversation many times before.

“I can see vague shapes without my glasses, Daisya. I can play.” Marie replied, squinting at Daisya, who held up his hands in defense.

“Not my fault when you get hit in the face then!”

“If you’re so concerned, why don’t you be on his team and I can team with Kanda?” Lenalee suggested sweetly, grabbing Kanda’s arm and smiling.

“What are we even doing?!” Kanda finally snapped, entirely too lost. He hated sports, they all new that. Why they would even suggest such a thing…

“Waterball! It’s like basketball only with a beach ball in a pool.” Lenalee said, ignoring his tone. And of course, he couldn’t say no to her when she smiled as brightly as she did. Sighing, he nodded his consent and leaned against the pool wall. Daisya looked mildly impressed, but dove away to fetch the ball so they could start.

 

               They’d been playing for nearly 2 hours when Kanda ended up in deeper water. Unfortunately, none of the others were paying attention to help him. Some young teen swam by, accidentally shoving him in even deeper, where his feet couldn’t touch the ground. Panic rushed through him as his body froze up in fear. Trying to keep his head above water, the sky started to darken around him, consciousness fading. Sounds were distorted by the water in his ears. After the initial panic, he found it was actually sort of peaceful, drifting there in the quiet. _And this is how it ends…_ He thought, a small smile on his lips as his eyes fell shut.

And then the peace was disturbed. He felt the water move as a new body entered the water beside him, wrapping strong arms around his torso. They propelled through the water, until they got to the shallow ends edge, this new set of strong arms dragging him out of the water. Fingers traced along his neck, finding his pulse. His senses were returning, and he could hear the low buzz of people talking, as well as the panting of this newcomer. He could feel a pressure on his chest and his lips, air being pushed into him. Blinking open his eyes, Kanda found himself staring straight up into a single green eye. Jerking back, Kanda drew in a deep breath before turning on his side to cough up water.

“Hey, take it easy, don’t hurt yourself.” The newcomer said, looking worried.

“I’m just fine.” Kanda lied, his voice rough from the amount of chlorine water he’d drunk. “Who are you anyways?!” He snapped, pushing Lavi away and sitting up, wringing his hair out.

“I’m a lifeguard here. My name’s Lavi…” Came the reply. Lavi was frowning, watching Kanda carefully. “Are you hurt, is that why you couldn’t swim?”

Kanda spluttered, staring at Lavi. “Do I LOOK hurt?” He snapped, “No, I’m fine! I just got pushed into the deep end, that’s all.” Lavi sighed lightly, nodding. He wouldn’t ask more questions, since Kanda seemed so pissed off, but he wasn’t going to let it go that easily. As he opened his mouth to ask something more, Lenalee sat heavily on the ground next to Kanda, eyes full of worry.

“Kanda! You’re okay! What happened?!” She clung to the long-haired man as Daisya and Marie knelt on either side of her.

“I’m fine! I just got caught off-guard that’s all!” He snapped, debating shoving her off.

“Hey, who’s this?” Daisya asked, staring at Lavi with keen interest. Wasn’t every day you saw a red-head wearing a patch over their eye while dripping wet.

“Hell if I know.” Kanda replied, rolling his eyes.

“My name’s Lavi. I’m a lifeguard, and just saved his life.” Lavi said, frowning as he motioned to Kanda. Daisya’s confusion cleared.

“Ah! Thanks then! Didn’t fancy calling our dad and saying Kanda drowned. He wouldn’t take too kindly to that!” He said, holding out his hand for Lavi to shake. Kanda tched and brushed Lenalee off, rising to his feet. The others rose as well, Daisya and Lavi in the middle of a handshake. Kanda turned his back on the others, listening to Lavi and Daisya talk. Daisya was so carefree and open… It was a wonder he hadn’t gotten himself into really big trouble. His legs were shaky, but Lenalee walked beside him, holding him up. When they reached the locker rooms, Kanda shooed her away, going to change. He hid away in a stall, peeling off his wet clothing. The scars on his chest were a bright, angry red against his abnormally pale skin. Pressing a palm over the marks, he sighed.

As he was pulling on his shirt, Kanda heard the door open, soft footsteps padding across the room to gently knock on his stall door.

“Hey, are you okay in there?” It was the lifeguard. Kanda bit down a growl of annoyance, opening the door and stepping past the red-head. His black hair hung down a bit past his waist, dripping water.

“I’m fine. What do you want?”

“Well, just to make sure you’re okay… Your brothers and friend are all ready, and they were wondering where you were.”

“They’re not my brothers.” Kanda snapped, gathering his long hair up into a horsetail, tying it with a length of soft rope. He was aware of the green-eyed gaze watching his every move, but he ignored him. Lavi didn’t reply, just sighed.

“Alright well if you’re okay… I’m glad, you gave all of us a huge scare there.” Kanda blinked as he shoved his soaking towel and swim trunks in the bag. This guy was acting like he was an old friend or something! The nerve!

“Ya, whatever. Don’t get all sappy, I don’t even know you.” Kanda snapped before turning on his heel and brushing by Lavi, leaving the locker room and heading for the waiting group.


	2. Chapter 2

It had been a couple days since the scare at the pool. Daisya had squealed to Tiedoll, and now Kanda was confined to the house till Tiedoll felt he was “better”. Not that he was sick, or had any lasting side effects. Other than that his mind kept straying to the red-haired lifeguard and how infuriating he was. He was laying on his bed, reading one of his few novels, his window thrown wide to let the fresh air in, when he heard the voices. The house three doors down had been for sale for a while, and the day before the pool incident, it had sold. Must be the buyers moving in. Tiedoll knocked on Kanda’s door, poking his head in.  
“Yuu! Our new neighbors are moving in! Come meet them with us.” Kanda cringed and carefully slid his bookmark away. He hated being called Yuu, but Tiedoll refused to call him by anything else.   
“Does this mean my imprisonment is over?” He grumbled, standing and gathering his hair up into a horsetail. Tiedoll grinned, signaling that yes, it was. Trailing after his foster father, Kanda fidgeted with his shirt. It would be a lie to say he wasn’t nervous, he hated meeting new people. But he composed himself as they reached the door, where Marie and Daisya waited. Marie held a basket in his arms, filled with some meals and treats from Tiedoll. Of course. Neighborhood welcome party right there… Kanda sighed as they headed out, trailing behind the others. He wore black cargo pants, black boots to his knees, a navy blue muscle shirt, and fingerless gloves that reached up to his elbows. Far from a welcoming sight.   
“Hi there!” Tiedoll chirped, reaching an old, short man watching the movers carry boxes. “Are you the new owner of this house?” The man turned around. A rim of black makeup around each eye made him look rather like a panda, and Kanda snorted.   
“Yes I am. Are you a neighbor? Call me Storico.” He said, holding out his hand for Tiedoll to take. He glanced over at Marie, Daisya and Kanda, nodding in greeting.   
“I’m Froi Tiedoll. This is Marie, Daisya, and Yuu. They’re my sons.” Tiedoll replied, taking the old man’s hand.   
“Oh yes, I have a grandson… Where did that useless boy get to…? LAVI! COME HERE!” The old man was able to produce a louder volume than Kanda thought would be possible for such a small figure. They heard a crash from the house, followed by a yelp, and then a sigh from the old man. A figure came barreling out of the house, sliding to a stop beside the old man. “This is my grandson, Lavi.” Kanda’s jaw dropped. It was the red-head with the eye patch from the pool. Kanda’s shock was nothing compared to Lavi’s. He stood there sputtering, blinking blankly at them.   
“H-h-hey!” Daisya sang out, “It’s you!” Tiedoll tilted his head at Lavi. “The lifeguard from the pool! Remember, I told you about him Tiedoll?” At the teen’s words, Kanda’s foster father’s face lit up.   
“Oh yes! It’s so nice to meet you! Thank you so much for saving my boy!” Tiedoll exclaimed, grabbing Lavi’s hand and shaking it vigorously. Lavi flushed red, rubbing the back of his head nervously.   
“Oh it was nothing… Just my job. No need to thank me!” Kanda made a small noise and turned on his heel, heading back towards his house. That was enough socializing for today.   
“Yuu! Come back here! Don’t be rude!” And of course, Kanda listened to Tiedoll reluctantly. He held out his hand to the red-head, who gently took it.   
“Thank you for the other day.” Kanda muttered unhappily. “My name is Yuu Kanda.” Lavi’s hand was warm, Kanda noted. Why he should think about that, he didn’t know.   
“Don’t mention it! No seriously, don’t mention it.” Lavi replied, laughing. “I’m Lavi. Lavi Storico.” He released the other’s hand, waving to the other two teens. Tiedoll and Storico started talking, a conversation about furniture set up and gardening, leaving the teens to talk. After a few minutes, Kanda managed to sneak back to his house, hiding away in his room. No matter how he tried to hide away in his books, his thoughts kept straying to the house three doors down, where the red-head was no doubt settling in.


	3. Chapter 3

Kanda was out in the front yard, working on his flower garden (Tiedoll had a vegetable garden but he was horrid with flowers), when he heard his name, muffled by his ear buds. Looking up, he blinked at the figure looming over him. Pulling out his ear buds, Kanda arched an eyebrow.   
“What do you want?” He snapped, rising to his feet. Lavi was a couple inches taller than him.   
“I wanted to see if you would like to come to town with me! I have to go grocery shopping but I don’t know the area, and Gramps is too busy to come.”  
“Do I look like a babysitter to you? Go by yourself.” Lavi pouted, putting his hands on his hips.  
“No, but I thought it could be fun… I could buy you some more flowers for your garden?” And that did it. That got Kanda’s interest. He would love new flowers for his garden…   
“… Alright. Fine. I’ll go with… But I demand at least 3 different flowers.” He replied, causing Lavi to beam and throw an arm over his shoulder. Kanda flinched at the physical contact, looking away from him.   
“Deal!” Lavi said, quickly taking a step back when Kanda flinched. “Do you have everything you need? I can drive us to town!”   
“Just let me grab my phone and tell Tiedoll where I’m going…” Kanda replied. He was quick, walking in the front door, shouting to Tiedoll, and grabbing his phone off the charger by the door. Walking back out, he saw a forest green mustang idling at the end of his driveway, Lavi sitting behind the wheel. It was far too fancy a car for an orphan wearing black skinny jeans and a beat up Star-Wars hand-me-down tee. Feeling self-conscious, Kanda climbed in the car, glancing at Lavi. The other was dressed in a pair of light jeans, and a lime-green Mtn. Dew tee, a headband holding his hair out of his face. Even in such casual clothing, Kanda couldn’t help but stare a little. He looked amazing, his hair holding a small, natural spike to it.   
“Whatcha looking at Yuu?” Lavi asked, blinking at the dark-haired teen. Kanda looked away quickly, blushing ever so slightly.   
“Nothing… You just have dirt on your nose.” He lied, cursing himself. Laughing, Lavi scrubbed at his nose, wiping away imaginary dirt.   
“Better?” To which Kanda nodded. “Alright let’s go!” Lavi chirped happily, putting the car in drive and starting down the road. He turned on the radio, Fall Out Boy blasting as they cruised along. Lavi belted along to the song, horribly off-key and messing up lyrics. Kanda stared out the window, trying not to smile. He had no doubt Lavi could sing well, that he was just acting bad for his enjoyment.   
“The Farmer’s Market is down Prince St. If you take a right here and then a left on Prince it’s right there.” Kanda said as they approached an intersection. Flicking his blinker on, Lavi followed the other’s directions. Pulling into the parking lot at the Market, Lavi unfolded his length from the parked car, looking around. Kanda crawled out of the car, hunching his shoulders. While Lavi didn’t know the area, he still claimed the lead, with Kanda trailing after.   
Half an hour later, Lavi had spent almost $300 on food, plus bought Kanda 3 types of roses, a butterfly bush, and a lotus flower plant. As they climbed back into the Mustang, Kanda felt his face heat up, the lotus placed on his lap. Lavi had grabbed the lotus as a surprise for him, not even knowing that was Kanda’s favorite plant.   
“Ah, that was a good haul! Gramps will be happy, and your new flowers will look great in that garden!” Lavi cheered, backing the car up and then pulling onto the road to head home. “We’ll have to go shopping again! Since I’m still new, I need someone to show me around!” Kanda was silent, too flustered to speak. Was Lavi saying he wanted to spend more time with him? Not possible. He was dark and gloomy and depressing. Everyone called him a weirdo. He was entering his senior year and still he had no friends, aside from Daisya and Marie and Lenalee, who hung out with different people at school. Better to not hang around and ruin this guy’s chances of being prom king.   
“Tch. Why don’t you bug Daisya to do it? He’d have more fun with a hyper brat like you.” Kanda snapped, cradling the flower in his lap. Lavi looked stricken as they pulled up out front Kanda’s house.   
“What? But I like hanging out with you!” Lavi tried to explain, but Kanda had already left the car, leaving all the plants but the lotus in it. Before Lavi could stop the car, the other was inside the house, and therefore unreachable. Lavi drove the Mustang into the garage, frowning to himself. That was bizarre… As he was unloading the groceries and flowers, he noticed a small black flip phone wedged between the middle console and the passenger seat. Kanda’s cellphone. “It must have fallen out of his pocket… I should get this back to him before he gets even madder…” Lavi muttered. Despite his first thought, he pocketed the slim device. He’d wait till Kanda came looking… And in the meantime, he might do a little snooping. But Kanda didn’t need to know. After carrying everything in and putting it all away, he retreated to his room, pulling out the forgotten cellphone. First up, the contacts. There were four. Frowning, Lavi looked through his texts. To contact “Old Man” there were a number of received texts that hadn’t been replied to. Mostly “Yuu, remember to eat your vegetables!” “Have a good day at school Yuu!” “Be nice to the other kids!” and “I love you Yuu!” Clearly “Old Man” was Tiedoll. To the contact “Ball geek” there were texts like “Oi, I need your help in chem” “Where are you? Old Man is flipping.” “Marie said you got kidnapped and now Tiedoll is crying CALL HIM RIGHT NOW YOU SACK OF SHIT.” (Almost every text had a reply, usually of the “okay, will do” nature). The contact “Blind Bat” was obviously Marie, since most texts concerned Kanda beating someone up, where Daisya was, or what Tiedoll was doing. Those two seemed to have the best relationship out of all of them… Maybe Lavi should try to talk to Marie. Then finally, the last contact was “Butterfly”, and it didn’t take him long to figure out it was the woman he met at the pool, Lenalee. Apparently butterflies were her favorite of any living creature. Most of their texts were around school work, but occasionally Kanda sent her a picture of a pretty butterfly on one of his flowers (to which she always replied “OMG SO PRETTY THANK YOU KANDA!” with a ton of smileys). All in all, the guy was pretty closed off… And then Lavi went to snoop in the pictures. The camera roll was loaded with pictures, a lot of them of his garden, some of them had him in them, clearly taken from outside phones and sent to him. Lavi fixated on one in particular. Kanda’s hair was down and he was kneeling beside a small purple rose, a sincere but small smile on his lips. His eyes were so full of joy and pride, his fingers gently curled around the petals. Lavi couldn’t help himself, he sent the picture to himself to save forever. Once he got the picture on his iPhone, he deleted record of the text and continued looking through the photos. There was nothing that exciting on the phone, and he gave up. Setting it on his bookshelf, Lavi stretched. Maybe he should bring the phone back to Kanda tonight… Flopping down on his bed, he stared at the ceiling, trying to decide. Wait for Kanda to come over, or bring the flowers and the phone over tonight… During his mental debate, the long day caught up with him and he drifted to sleep.   
Shortly after Lavi let him off, Kanda had barricaded himself in his room, cranking up his music and getting lost in a painting. It wasn’t for hours that he realized he couldn’t find his phone… And there was only one place it could be. He groaned, slapping himself in the forehead. How could he be so stupid to not secure his phone?! Dammit, now he had to go talk to the red-head again… Sighing, Kanda put away his paints and easel, pulling on his sneakers before catching sight of the clock… Maybe he’d go talk to the red-head when it wasn’t two in the morning…   
Kicking off his sneakers he stripped to his boxers before turning off the light and crawling into his bed, laying on his back and looking at the ceiling. He’d only felt like this once before, for a girl at his previous foster home… He ground his heels into his eyes, growling into the dark. His mind was racing, and he rolled over onto his stomach, burying his face into the pillow. After he got his phone back, Kanda would avoid the red-head like he was the plague. Even if Lavi was going to Order High, their senior class was big enough… Eventually he managed to settle his mind enough to fall asleep.


	4. Chapter 4

                It was a loud rapping on his door that woke Kanda. He rolled over, looking at the alarm clock. 11:37 am on a Sunday… Why was someone waking him up so early…? Struggling out of bed, he pulled on a pair of pants.

“What do you want?” He barked, swinging the door open. On the other side, stood Tiedoll and Lavi. “Oh.” Kanda said, slamming the door shut again. He had expected Tiedoll. He hadn’t expected Lavi. And he had no shirt on. Maybe if he was lucky, Lavi hadn’t seen his scar… Cursing himself, he scrambled around, trying to find a shirt. Kanda could hear Tiedoll trying to make an apology for him, Lavi just waving him off. Finally, Kanda found a shirt and pulled it on. Ignoring that it was inside out, he cracked his door open.

“Good morning Yuu!” Tiedoll chirped, grinning brightly.

“I’ll repeat myself. What do you want?” He grumbled, avoiding looking at Lavi.

“I brought your phone and flowers over for you!” Lavi replied, putting his hands on his hips and grinning. “Your father helped me bring the flowers to your garden shed, so they’re waiting there.”

“And my phone?” Kanda snapped, wishing Tiedoll hadn’t let Lavi in the house. He had cringed when Tiedoll was called his father, a movement Lavi hadn’t missed. Rather than comment, Lavi extended his hand, holding out Kanda’s cellphone to him. Snatching it up, Kanda tucked it into his pants, glowering at the red-head.

“I put my number in there, in case you ever want to do something or just chill, so feel free to text me!” Lavi said, smiling, ignoring Kanda’s fiery glare.

“I’ve just had an idea! How about we all go out to brunch?” Tiedoll suggested, earning the fiery glare.

“No. I’m going back to sleep.” Kanda replied, attempting to slam the door. Of course, Tiedoll put his shoulder to the wood, keeping it open.

“Oh, Yuu, it’s the least we can do, since he is a new neighbor! Besides, he bought you flowers and brought your phone back!”

“Then you, Daisya, and Marie take him! I’m going back to bed!”

“No you’re not Yuu. You’ll come with us, and you’ll be nice to Lavi.” Tiedoll said, his voice changing slightly. Kanda froze, staring at Tiedoll. Breathing out through his nose, Kanda bowed his head.

“Fine. Let me get a shower and then we can go.” Tiedoll’s cheery smile reappeared, and he clapped his hands together.

“Alright! We’ll wait in the kitchen! Don’t be too long.” He turned away, ushering Lavi away down the stairs. Kanda sighed and went to raid his closet, finding a pair of light denim jeans and dark purple polo. Fetching a fresh pair of boxers, the teen ventured to the bathroom, locking the door behind him and starting the water. He preferred it scalding hot, so it took a minute to warm up. During that time, he brushed his hair out and put his contacts in. Finally the water was hot enough and he stepped into the shower.

15 minutes later, he emerged from the bathroom, clean, dressed, and with his hair in a loose braid down his back. Yawning, he padded downstairs, peering into the kitchen. Daisya sat on the top of the couch, wearing his usual shorts and jersey ensemble. Marie was dressed in slacks and a button up shirt. It looked a bit strange, since he had such a bulk to him, but it was what the boy was comfortable in. Tiedoll wore khaki capris and a tie-dye t-shirt. And Lavi… Lavi was dressed in well-fitted skinny jeans and a light blue Snoopy shirt, the headband pushing his hair back out of his face. Kanda caught himself staring, shaking his head and opting instead to look at the fridge.

“Are we going?” He growled from the doorway.

“Yuu! You look nice.” Tiedoll said, standing and crossing to grab his wallet and keys. “Now that you’re ready, we can head on out.” Kanda glanced at the clock. 12:07. He had a feeling this was going to be a long brunch… The others trailed after Tiedoll, Kanda taking the back.

“SHOTGUN!” Daisya shouted, dashing in front of the others to make sure he got his desired seat. Marie sighed, adjusting his thick glasses. He’d take the seat behind Daisya. That way Kanda couldn’t, because if Kanda sat behind Daisya, they annoyed and harassed the other the whole ride. That would leave Lavi in the seat next to Marie and Kanda in the back. The latter didn’t mind this arrangement at all. Tiedoll drove a Honda Odyssey, which made him the “soccer mom”. Climbing into the back seat, Kanda rested his elbow on the window, and his chin on his fist… But then Lavi climbed in next to him.

“What are you doing? Sit by Marie.” Kanda snapped, to which Lavi leaned back on the seat, making himself at home.

“I’d rather sit here with you. You don’t mind do you Marie?” Lavi asked. Marie looked over his shoulder and took in the sight before shrugging.

“Not at all.” Kanda gaped at the 19 year old.

“Traitor…” He growled, earning a small chuckle from the older.

 

               The ride was uneventful, to say the least. Daisya was talking about the national soccer finales and something about Order High’s team (which he captained), Marie read, Tiedoll talked to Daisya and Lavi, and Kanda glared out the window, trying to ignore Tiedoll’s attempts to drag him into conversation. When the Odyssey pulled up at the restaurant, they all crawled out, and Kanda stood as far from Lavi as he could. He trailed after the group as they entered, picking a chair at the opposite end of the group from Lavi, preferring to sit by Daisya and Tiedoll.

“So, Lavi, what year are you and where are you going to go to school?” Tiedoll asked after they had ordered their brunch. Kanda glanced up, having been wondering the same thing.

“Ah, I’m a senior.” Lavi replied, grinning. “I’m 19, but I fell behind when I was a kid. Gramps considered home schooling me, since being the new kid as a senior is rough, but I convinced him to let me go to Order High.” Kanda felt the blood drain out of his face and he quickly ducked his face away from Lavi’s gaze. The same high school. That would make avoiding the red-head difficult. Order High was a fairly small school, with a senior class of about 130 people.

“That’s where we go!” Daisya chimed in, grinning brilliantly as he motioned to Kanda and himself. “Marie’s in college, but you might see him around the school sometimes too!” Marie rolled his eyes, shrugging off Lavi’s upcoming questions. Kanda was thinking up an excuse to leave to the bathroom when the food arrived and conversation was interrupted. He focused on his plate, trying to ignore his pounding heart and racing thoughts.

When they finished, and Tiedoll had paid, they loaded up into the car again, this time Kanda claimed shotgun. Lavi sat in the back with Daisya. Unfortunately, Daisya started talking about soccer again, and Lavi held the conversation, sparking a friendship there. Lavi just so happened to be a soccer player as well. Daisya convinced him to try out for his team when the semester started, and Kanda mentally cursed. Tiedoll hosted frequent parties for the soccer team. If Lavi was on it, that meant he’d be over a lot. The car hadn’t stopped moving when Kanda opened the door and launched himself out, through the garage door straight to his bedroom, ignoring Tiedoll shouting after him. He locked his door, pacing around while he chewed his lip. The black-haired teen could hear everyone milling around downstairs, Tiedoll trying to apologize for Kanda’s behavior, Lavi laughing it off, Daisya mentioning how anti-social Kanda actually is. Flopping down on his bed, Kanda smashed the pillow over his face, blocking out the light. Unfortunately that did nothing for the voices, so he was forced to listen to them until Lavi decided to leave.


	5. Chapter 5

 

               The next couple of weeks were uneventful, Kanda staying holed in his room while Lavi and Daisya explored the city and played soccer. Next thing any of them knew, it was Sunday night before school started. Tiedoll asked Kanda and Daisya if they had completed their summer homework, to which Kanda angrily muttered that he had, and Daisya just laughed. Daisya never did summer homework, and Tiedoll knew it. He did well in the rest of his schooling, just never did any work over summer.

The next morning, hell commenced. They were all up at 5:30 am, scrambling for backpacks and notebooks, lunches and money. Marie was headed to his college (an hour bus ride away), and Daisya and Kanda headed to the bus stop down the road. Foster kids couldn’t afford cars, even though they were licensed. Halfway to the stop, a Mustang pulled up alongside them.

“Yo, Daisya, Kanda! Want a ride?” Lavi chirped, looking far too happy for someone awake at 6 am.

“I’d love one!” Daisya said, nearly jumping up and down in excitement. He launched himself around the car, claiming shotgun, and leaving the cramped back seat for Kanda. Both boys turned and stared at the long-haired boy. Kanda looked torn. He wanted to get in that car- he hated the bus, it was too crowded- but it would mean being close to Lavi. Catching his lip between his teeth, Kanda hunched his shoulders, closing the distance between him and the car. Lavi beamed, opening the door and moving his seat forward so the tall teen could fold himself into the back seat. Once Kanda was situated, Lavi started the car towards the school again.

“So, why don’t you guys drive yourselves to school?” Lavi asked, tilting his head and glancing at Kanda in the rearview mirror. Kanda went bright red as he made eye-contact, and quickly looked away, glowering out the window.

“Tiedoll can’t afford to get even one more car, so we just take the bus. Marie’s saving up for one, but Kanda and I are on our own.” Daisya shrugged. “It’s what happens when you’re a foster kid, I guess.” Kanda flinched, shooting Daisya a scathing look right as Lavi sucked in a breath. _Surely he already knew we’re foster kids?_ Kanda thought, eyeing the back of Lavi’s neck through the space between the seat and headrest.

“You’re foster kids?” Lavi asked, voice holding a strange mix of emotions. Clearly, he didn’t know. Daisya shrugged again.

“Ya, but it’s whatever. Tiedoll’s chill, and he’s letting us all stay there even when we’re out of the system. Hell we could probably stay there till we die if we really wanted to.” Kanda tried to sink into the seat, his face warm as Lavi glanced in the rearview mirror at him again. Thankfully, they pulled into the school parking lot just then. The moment they stopped, Kanda shoved Daisya’s seat forward and scrambled out of the car, rushing into the school building. Lavi and Daisya stared after him, Lavi looking slightly wounded.

“Hey, I’m sorry about Kanda. He doesn’t like to talk about being in the system and stuff… I dunno what happened to him before, he doesn’t talk about it, but he was 10 when he came to live with us, and he was pretty beat up.” Daisya was watching the door Kanda had vanished through, a sad expression on his face. “It took him about 2 years to even so much as talk to us. He’s a good guy, he just has a tough shell around him.” Lavi nodded slightly, expression softening.

“I get it. I’m not going to stop trying to be his friend, but I understand.” The red-head muttered, earning a thumbs-up and a small smile from the brown-haired teen.

“Perfect, he needs all the friends he can get! Now let’s go before we end up being late.”

 

               Kanda’s first three classes passed without incident, no sight of Lavi at all. He was finally starting to relax, waiting for the bell to ring for his fourth period- Government- when a familiar face swept in. Lavi noticed Kanda and made a beeline for the seat beside him. His heart started to race and he bit his lip, turning away from the red-head. Lavi slid gracefully into the seat beside Kanda, setting his backpack down with a soft thump.

“Look at that, we have a class together!” Lavi chirped, beaming like he’d won something special. Kanda just grunted, pulling his book and notebook out of his bag. The teacher swept into the room, calling everyone’s attention. Lavi seemed mesmerized. Even Kanda had to admit she was a fairly good looking woman. Miss. Nine, a tall, blonde woman with a commanding voice and posture. She was very passionate about her subject, and she was very bright.

“Good morning class, welcome back to Order High. I recognize most of you, but it seems we have a new face here. Mind introducing yourself?” She said, her voice clear and sharp. Lavi shot out of his seat, looking strangely nervous.

“Hi, I’m Lavi Storico. My Gramps and I just moved here from Spain. I’ve lived all over the world, Germany, Russia, England, Japan, Australia, you name it I’ve probably at least visited there!” Lavi chuckled nervously, wringing his hands just out of sight behind his desk. Kanda arched an eyebrow, wondering why the red-head was so nervous. Nine nodded at Lavi, who sank into his chair with a relieved sigh, and turned to the board. She started on her lecture, but Kanda couldn’t stop watching Lavi. Why was he so shaken? Even now, his hands twitched involuntarily. Was he afraid of Miss Nine? She was intimidating, but not scary. The only time Kanda had been scared of her was when Marie had failed a paper and she had lectured Tiedoll for almost an hour about the importance of learning about Government. Lavi was writing, so Kanda turned his attention to the lecture, until he felt a piece of paper slide over his hand. Lavi had passed him a note. Rolling his eyes, Kanda looked at it. And then immediately wished he hadn’t. _Sorry for bringing up the car thing in the car. I didn’t know you felt so strongly._ Kanda ground his teeth, shrugged his shoulder, and tried to turn away from the red-head. Lavi got the picture, it seemed, because he focused on the lesson for the rest of the 30 minutes.

Kanda couldn’t get out of the room fast enough, rushing to his advanced chemistry class. Thankfully, Lavi went to his reading class then, and the rest of the day passed without event.


	6. Chapter 6

 

               Daisya was already at home when Kanda got there. Of course he was, he and Lavi both had eight period off. He was making himself a bowl of pasta, and set out a second one when Kanda stormed in, slamming the door shut.

“Rough day?” Daisya asked, peering carefully at Kanda.

“Three essays due on Thursday, a pop-quiz over stuff I didn’t read, and five different reading assignments for tomorrow and Wednesday.” He growled, grabbing his bowl as soon as Daisya finished dishing pasta out. “And Chang wants me on the Tai-Kwan-Do team again.” Daisya nodded sympathetically, making a face.

“This is why I’m not trying to take college credit courses.” To which Kanda threw a forkful of pasta at him. The soccer player laughed, picking the pasta out of his hair and off the table, adding it to his bowl. “Lavi said he’s in your Government class. Said Nine is a really hot teacher, and it’s not fair.” He commented. Kanda tensed, his heart rate picking up. He ignored the feeling in his chest.

“Well, she is pretty good looking. He might only have one eye, but even he should be able to see that.” It came out a lot more snappish than he intended and Daisya raised an eyebrow.

“He’s actually got perfect eyesight in his right eye. When he was a kid, he was in a car wreck that killed his parents and left him with his grandfather. A shard of glass punctured his eye and it’s permanently scared and sightless. He says it’s easier to hide it than deal with all the questions.” Kanda frowned, feeling bad for the older teen. He shook it off, shrugging his shoulders.

“That’s rough… He’s kind of like us then, huh?” It was barely a whisper, a thought put out loud. As soon as it was out of his mouth, Kanda wanted to take it back. Daisya blinked, shocked. Kanda had never spoken of his past, that was the closest he’d ever come. But, just like that, the moment was gone as Kanda quite literally ran from the kitchen. When he was safe in his room, Kanda pulled out his phone, staring at a half-written message to Lavi. Of course, the actual contact was “Eye-Patch”, and that was how the red-head had saved it. He pulled out a textbook, flipping it open to where the note was stashed. Sighing, Kanda brushed his bangs away from his face, deleted the message, and instead typed one word. _Hey_. Before he could second guess himself, he hit send, snapping the phone shut as the blood rushed to his face. He stuffed his phone in his pocket, grabbing his math book and flipping to the right page, trying to immerse himself in that. It worked, and when his phone let out a high pitched chime, Kanda jumped. He fished the small black device out of his pocket, chewing his lip anxiously. He flipped it open and hit view message. “Eye-Patch” came up, with his greeting and a reply. _Hey Kanda, wondering when I’d hear from you!_ After reading the message, Kanda felt like throwing the phone across the room. His stomach tensed, nerves setting in. _Do you need help on the Gov homework?_ He replied, slapping himself in the forehead. That was stupid to say! Oh well, too late now… His phone went off again. _Are you offering to help me? Cause I’ll take you up on that one! :DDDD_ Came the reply. Kanda stared at the screen, unsure what to say next. He felt the beginnings of an anxiety attack, and tried to breathe deeply, only to find his lungs wouldn’t expand. His legs were shaking too hard for him to stand, but that didn’t stop him from trying- and falling straight into his closet. He gripped the phone, quickly typing a reply with shakey fingers. _K. Come over._ And then he dropped the phone, curling into a ball on his closet floor. Kanda bit the inside of his cheek until he tasted blood, eyes squeezed shut. Having sent the final message he did eased a bit of the anxiety, but not enough. A few minutes later, he was still curled on his floor, most of the attack having subsided. His chest was aching, from lack of breath, and his scars felt like they were on fire. There was a soft knock on his door, and then Lavi’s voice followed.

“Hey, Kanda, you there? I brought some other homework, hoping you could help me with that too, if that’s okay.” The long-haired teen slowly uncurled, muscles screaming in protest, as they’d been cramped up. Pushing himself to his feet, Kanda tried to straighten his hair.

“Ya, that’s fine.” He muttered, opening the door. Of course, despite his attempt to look normal, his cheek was swelling slightly from the force with which he bit it, his hair was sticking up, and his face was red. Not to mention he was still shaking slightly. Lavi noticed it all. But he had enough smarts and tact not to say anything. He entered the room when Kanda stepped aside, taking the desk chair and setting his backpack down. Kanda perched on the bed, pulling his bag closer to him.

“Daisya said you’re good at chemistry, and I suck at it. Mind helping me with it?”

“Sure, what do you have to do?” The distraction of schoolwork helped ease the rest of Kanda’s attack out, and soon he even stopped shaking. His heart was still racing, especially whenever Lavi’s hand brushed his, or the red-head got his goofy victory grin on his face. All too soon, they finished all their homework, and Lavi stood up, stretching to go home. His shirt rose and exposed a thin line of flesh above his pants (which were sitting rather low). Kanda’s face flared red and he looked away, his heart pounding. His mind had filled in what lower down may look like, especially given Lavi’s ginger happy trail. The red-head tilted his head, pursing his lips as he thought, watching Kanda. The other stood, letting his extra-large hoodie drape down to mid-thigh. At that moment, Kanda was thankful the local thrift store carried over large clothes, because it hid what could potentially lead to an awkward moment.

“Well, I need to be getting home, before Gramps comes looking for me. This was cool, let’s do it again sometime, okay?” Lavi said, heading towards Kanda’s bedroom door. Kanda couldn’t look at the taller teen, just shrugged.

“Sure, might as well.” He grumbled, watching Lavi leave out of the corner of his eye. He closed his door and locked it when the red-head was clear of it, figuring he would show himself out. Kanda had more important things to deal with than the red-head walking to the front door. Or rather, a more important thing _caused_ by said red-head. Kanda fidgeted as he chewed his lip, trying to figure out how to resolve his problem. Finally, he remembered something Tiedoll had told him during one of his “sex-ed” lessons (which Kanda had tried his hardest to block out) about cold showers. Grabbing up a change of clothes, he made his way quickly down the hall to the bathroom, locking the door and quickly turning on the shower. Oh, how he hated that one-eyed red-head…

 


	7. Chapter 7

 

               Kanda was leaning back in his chair, eyes closed, with his chin down against his chest, trying to rest before class began. He didn’t even have to open his eyes to know the second Lavi walked into the room. He had a presence about him. Or maybe it was just Kanda’s little crush that gave him a sixth sense about where Lavi was. Who knows? _Who cares?_ Kanda thought bitterly, not moving a muscle. Lavi set his bag on the ground and slid into his chair, watching Kanda with one eyebrow raised.

“What are you staring at?” The black-haired teen growled, arms folded over his chest.

“What are you doing?”  
“I asked you first.”

“Ya, well, I asked you second!”

“What are you, six?” Kanda snapped, jerking his head up and pinning Lavi with a glare. Lavi just grinned brightly in response.

“Yep!” Kanda sighed, a response on the tip of his tongue.

“Good afternoon class.” Nine announced herself, sweeping gracefully into the room, heels clicking on the grey tile. “Today, we’re doing a partner assignment. Pair up.” She commanded. Lavi scooted closer to Kanda and put a hand on his shoulder. Kanda flinched away from the contact, biting his tongue. The rest of the class moved to make pairs, and then Nine took stock, writing down the partnerships. He had to admit, the idea of working on a project with Lavi excited Kanda. More time together, he supposed. And that train of thought just made him even more pissed.

“What kind of assignment could it be for the second day of class?” Lavi muttered, lounging back in his chair and watching as papers were passed back down the rows.

“The numbers of the senators for our state, and the reps of each nearby county is listed on that paper. Read it over, and if you have any questions, go ahead and ask. If not, get started on your work.” Nine said, taking a seat in front of her computer. Kanda snorted, rolling his eyes and taking the paper handed to him.

“That answers that.” Lavi muttered, green eye scanning over the paper. “This doesn’t seem that bad! Maybe tonight we can make a call to our senator and ask him some questions.” Lavi offered, grinning broadly. “Maybe over dinner tonight?” The raven-haired teens face flared red, and he turned away, clicking his tongue, hoping to give off an impression of annoyance.

“It’d be better to get this done, I guess.” Kanda grumbled, hiding his face behind his bangs as he searched through his bag.

“Why don’t you just come home with me, and we can get a start on it?” He watched the other, arching an eyebrow at his back. Kanda straightened, swinging his horsetail over the back of his desk chair, leaning back in it.

“Fine, that’ll work. We do have the rest of this class period though. Whatever we don’t get done, we can do at your place.” Lavi nodded, flipping open his notebook and tapping his pen on the paper.

“I think I have an idea…” Lavi started, getting Kanda’s attention.

The rest of the hour was spent with the two discussing ideas, figuring out what they should do their report on.

 

               The final bell rang and Kanda shouldered his bag, slipping out of his classroom. Melting into the crowd, he made his way towards the doors to the buses. There was a tug on his hair, and he turned around, growling. Lenalee stood there, smiling sweetly.

“Hello Kanda!” She chirped, pulling him off to the side of the hall.

“It’s you.” He grumbled, leaning a shoulder on a locker. “Long time no see.”

“It has been! I got wrapped up in a theatre performance. We’re still looking for our lead guy~” Lenalee sang out, looking pointedly at Kanda. He snorted, rolling his eyes.

“I’m not an actor, I’ve told you that. Stop asking.”

“But Kandaaaaaaaaaaaa! You would be sooooooo good!” Lenalee whined, putting her hands on her hips.

“No, I wouldn’t be.” He snapped, grinding his teeth. Lenalee opened her mouth to reply when a shock of red hair appeared in Kanda’s line of sight. “Ask him.” She spun around, noticing Lavi. Her eyes lit up, and Kanda sighed in relief.

“Yo, Kanda! What are you doing over here? You’re coming home with me! … Oh, who are you?” Lavi finally noticed Lenalee, putting on his charm.

“Lavi, this is Lenalee. You met her at the pool.” The recognition passed over both of their faces, and Lenalee bounced on the balls of her feet hopefully.

“YES! YOU’D BE PERFECT!” She squealed, grabbing Lavi’s arm. “You’d be PERFECT as the lead for our play!” His confusion cleared and he smiled, brushing his free hand through his hair.

“Well, I am a pretty amazing actor!” Lavi cooed, puffing out his chest.

“We’re having a casting call tomorrow after classes! You _have_ to come!”

After extracting a promise from Lavi, Lenalee pranced away down the hall, leaving the two boys alone, in a now fairly empty hall. Noting the time, Kanda groaned, worried since he’d missed the bus. Years of habit took its toll on him, and he forgot Lavi was going to give him a ride home. Except, Lavi was standing right beside him, giving him a peculiar look.

“What?” Kanda snapped, annoyed.

“Nothing.” Lavi replied, turning away. “Coming? Do you need to get anything from your place, or are you good with going straight to my house?” And then it slapped him right in the face.

“O-oh well… No, I’ve got everything I need…” He muttered, embarrassed he’d forgotten. Lavi didn’t even think twice, just grinned over his shoulder and headed out. Kanda trailed after him, letting his thoughts consume him. When they reached the car, Kanda nearly walked right into Lavi, so distracted was he. While Kanda sputtered an apology, Lavi just laughed and slid in the driver’s seat, starting the Mustang. Kanda settled into the passenger seat, sighing as he leaned back into the leather. It had been a long day, and he didn’t know if he really felt like doing this project tonight, but it was too late to say no, now. Lavi seemed to understand Kanda pretty well, and he stayed silent for the ride, keeping the radio on low. It ended up being a 20 minute drive due to traffic, and by the time Lavi pulled the car into the garage, Kanda had fallen asleep. Lavi turned off the car, watching the other for a few minutes. The black-haired teen’s face softened when he slept, the creases on his forehead smoothing out. His emotions showed clear on his face, and his breathing was easy and gentle. It was a rare sight, one only Tiedoll had ever seen. Lavi wasn’t in the business of looking a gift horse in the mouth, and therefore he took his time committing the sight to memory. Kanda was pretty attractive when he slept. Finally, Lavi shook his head, clearing his thoughts and got out of the car, circling it and opening the passenger side door. Shaking Kanda’s shoulders to wake him, Lavi spoke softly, hoping the other teen wasn’t a bad morning person. Kanda jerked awake, and pulled out of Lavi’s hands, but otherwise he didn’t do anything. As the sleep cleared from his face, the hard edges returned.

“… Sorry.” He muttered, pushing by the red-head and grabbing his bag. Lavi frowned at him, shrugged, and led the way into the house.

“Hey, you’re fine. If you’re that tired, you can just go home. Or take a nap in my room while I figure out the details of the call we need to do.”

“No, it’s fine. Let’s just do our work.” And that was that. No more discussion, they just went straight to work.

 


	8. Chapter 8

                The dark was either Kanda’s friend, or his worst enemy. Tonight, it was his enemy. He could see the flowers spread out on the ground, but instead of the usual bodies, the bodies he knew should be there, it was Lavi, Daisya, Tiedoll, Marie, and Lenalee on the ground. He sat in his bed, knees drawn up to his chest, surveying the floor. It was purely hallucination, and he knew it, but it looked so real. His limbs were trembling, jaw clenched. Blood covered the gentle purple of the lotus flowers, dripping off the petals. His phone lay on the pillow, but it was forgotten. No matter how he tried to close his eyes, rub away the image, it was still there. The noises were the worst part. A horrible sucking noise, of a body stuck in mud. The crunching of a car frame being smashed. The sound of a young girl’s skull being smashed against a metal bedframe. The noises, the sights, they were inescapable.

And then. His phone chirped, loud and clear. It interrupted his thoughts, unfroze his limbs. The flowers were still there, so were the bodies, all of it. His limbs were still shaking, and he could barely hold the phone, but it made his mind work again. It wasn’t real. Simply an illusion. There was a text on his phone, from ‘eye-patch’. _You still up? You left your chem book here, I’ll bring it by in the morning. Let Daisya know I’ll give you both a ride to school, kay?_ Kanda snorted, shaking his head. Lavi really didn’t need to have text him about this, and he knew Lavi knew that. He had to admit he was grateful though. The unnecessary text had snapped him out of his usual night-long trance. _Ya ya, do whatever._ He shot back, rising to his feet and flicking on his desk lamp. It cast more shadows in the room, but it cast enough light to dispel the majority of the blood coated flowers. He padded out into the hall, ignoring the lotus blossoms flooding the hall. The cold air felt nice on his bare chest and legs, and he needed some water. The kitchen tiles were cold on his feet, and he walked on the balls of his feet, minimizing contact. It might only be mid-August, but sometimes it got pretty cold at night.

Pulling a water bottle out of the fridge, Kanda leaned on the counter. He was worried about their Government report, since the senator hadn’t been the most polite, or most patient with them. Damn, politicians are assholes. He drained the bottle and crumpled it against his chest, throwing it in the trash and heading back upstairs to his room. Kanda fished a pair of headphones out of his desk drawer, plugging it into his iPod and sticking the buds in his ear. Cranking up his music, the black-haired teen settled into his bed and put his pillow over his face. He might as well try to get some sleep.

Sleep, however, was a long time coming. He couldn’t stop thinking about the timing of Lavi’s text, and of the red-head in general. Pressing the pillow against his face, Kanda groaned. Emotions were so annoying. _Just try to think of something else._ He thought desperately, finally settling his thoughts on the play auditions. Lena wouldn’t let him off, even if Lavi did audition. He’d have to find something to perform tomorrow for it. His mind was drifting over his previous audition monologues, and it lulled him into a restless sleep.

 

               His alarm went off 4 hours after he fell asleep, and he sat bolt upright. The earbuds had fallen out of his ears, and the iPod had stopped playing. That was alright with Kanda though. He rubbed his face, yawning behind his hands. _That was so not enough sleep…_ He thought darkly, swinging his long legs out of the bed. Gathering up a change of clothes, he padded down the hall to the bathroom, claiming it before Marie (who was starting to make his way out of his room). Kanda took a hot shower, enjoying the feel of the water scalding his back. His hair reached to his waist when it was let hung loose, and when it was wet, it covered his butt. It took him about 30 minutes to get his hair completely cleaned, and by then Daisya and Marie were milling around the kitchen, waiting. Kanda pulled on his form-fitted cargo pants, slipping his phone into his pocket before he forgot it. He slipped the purple, galaxy print t-shirt over his head, glancing at himself in the mirror as he pulled his hair into a horsetail, as usual. Stepping out of the bathroom, he grabbed Daisya’s arm as the soccer player lunged for the now open bathroom.

“Hey!” Daisya whined, as Marie slid into the bathroom and closed the door. “You’re gonna make us late for the bus!” He pinned a glare on Kanda, who simply shrugged.

“Good thing we’re not taking it today. Lavi told me last night he’s going to pick us up.”

“Yesssssss!” Daisya cheered, throwing his fist up in the air in victory. “No rushing for me!” Kanda rolled his eyes, releasing the other teens arm. He started for the kitchen, wondering if Daisya had left him any waffles. His phone buzzed in his pocket. Ignoring it, Kanda pulled a box of waffles from the freezer, putting the very last waffle in the toaster. He got his plate and fork ready, the syrup already on the table. The phone buzzed again, and he sighed, slipping it out and flipping it open. 2 new messages from eye-patch.

_Hope you’re up! I’ll be over in 30 or so. Just gotta find a book._

_So that really cute chick, Lenalee, asked me to audition. I’ve never auditioned for a play. Wanna help me find a mono during lunch?_

Kanda’s heart fell. He kept fixating on those words. _That really cute chick._ He should have known, there was no way someone like Lavi could like someone like him. He jumped when the toaster pinged, signaling his waffle was done. He used his for to lift it out of the toaster, throwing it on his plate. He doused it in syrup and started in on it. Kanda didn’t bother to text him back, his mind was in turmoil. Once he finished devouring the waffle, he brought his plate to the sink, leaving it in there. Daisya cleared his throat behind him, causing Kanda to jump again.

“So, when is Lavi gonna be here?” He asked, raising an eyebrow. He had his makeup on, including eyeliner. As was his custom, on the first day of the soccer team meeting up, he wore two purple streaks that ran from his eyes down about an inch and a half. It was, as Daisya called it, his game face. Kanda shook his head, breaking out of his thoughts.

“He text me about 20 minutes ago that it would be half an hour.” He replied. No sooner were the words out of his mouth than the doorbell rang. Daisya perked right up and scrambled for the door, grabbing his backpack on the way. Sighing, the black-haired teen followed, albeit more slowly. He picked up his backpack and walked out the door, closing it gently behind him. Tiedoll was sleeping in, since he’d hauled ass to get a commissioned piece done. Daisya was talking Lavi’s ear off, and Kanda froze momentarily. Maybe he should just go back in the house and pretend to be sick. No, no use now. Lavi spotted him, and Daisya would call out his bullshit anyways. He made his way down the stairs, holding in a sigh.

“Thanks for the ride.” He murmured, squeezing into the Mustang before Lavi could say anything. Daisya hopped in shotgun, and Lavi took his position as driver. The scent of pine forest and rain drifted off the red-head, and Kanda bit his tongue. His purple shirt fit his form nicely, the gold lion on the front conflicting with the vivid red of his hair. Today, Lavi wore a deep purple headband, keeping his hair out of his face. Even his eye patch was different. It was a deep gold color, meshing well with the rest of his outfit. This guy knew what he was doing, clearly. Kanda ripped his eyes away from the rearview mirror (which he was using to take in Lavi’s appearance) and sat back in his seat.

The ride passed with silence from Kanda, the occasional comment from Lavi, and non-stop chatter from Daisya. When they got to school, Daisya noticed some of his soccer mates, and jumped out of the car, racing to them.

“You never text me back. Would you help me find a monologue at lunch?” His voice startled the black-haired teen, who had been zoning out. Lavi looked so earnest, Kanda hunched his shoulders.

“Alright fine.” He agreed. “I need to find one myself, anyways...”

“You’re auditioning too?! Great!” A wide grin split his face, and for the first time Kanda noticed light freckles spattered over Lavi’s nose and cheeks.

“Ya, ya. I’m only doing it cause Lena would yell if I didn’t, and I can’t stand her yelling.” He grumbled, folding his arms over his chest. He should have grabbed a coat, but he’d been distracted. Lavi noticed and motioned for them to start heading into the school.

“Well, I’m glad you’ll be there! That way I won’t make a fool of myself in front of a bunch of total strangers.” Lavi replied, chuckling lightly. Kanda flushed slightly, turning his face away from the red-head.

“Usually auditions are only about 4 people in the theatre at once, plus the director, so you won’t be in front of that big of a crowd…” The red-head shrugged, tugging on his earlobe.

“Ya, but I’m not an actor, and even if it’s only one stranger, I’ll still be making a fool of myself. Better to do it in front of friends.” Kanda’s heart jumped and he let himself smile slightly for a moment. Then he shook his head and grunted.

“I suppose…” He was going to add something when someone came over, grabbing Lavi away. The red-head cast an apologetic look at Kanda, letting himself get drug off. Kanda sighed and turned away, going to his first period class.


	9. Chapter 9

Lunch time came faster than Kanda anticipated, and he text Lavi that he was in the library. Amazingly, the older teen was quick to show up, shaking off a girl from his last class who was trying to flirt with him (that set Kanda’s blood boiling). Kanda led Lavi to the isle of scripts, his horsetail swinging in time with his pace. Lavi watched the black strands, mesmerized.  
“What kind of monologue are you looking for? If I remember correctly, Lena’s crew is doing Hamlet.” Lavi nodded, considering for a second.   
“How about something with an angry, emotional tone?”   
“That… Would actually be perfect.” Kanda replied, walking down the rows and pulling some books out, handing them back to Lavi. “Check those for ones you may like.”   
“What about you?”   
“I think I already have one that should work.” Lavi nodded and set to skimming the books. It only took them about 10 minutes to pick one out, and they copied it down and left the library. They had an hour left for lunch, and decided to go to a fast food joint for it. Lavi drove them and bought their meals. While they ate, they each rehearsed their monologue for the other, and by the time they got back to the school, both Kanda and Lavi were confident in their ability. 

The rest of the day passed without event, and then it was time for the audition. Kanda slunk in, looking rather annoyed, and Lavi paraded in, looking confident. Plopping into the seat beside Kanda, Lavi sighed, wringing his hands. He was nervous. They both were. One by one, they were called on to perform their monologues. Kanda figured if he was doing this, he might as well put effort into it, and so he did. He took his bow and sauntered off the stage, settling back into his seat. They called Lavi’s name, and he stood hesitantly. When he got on the stage, he froze. Kanda started to rise from his seat, worried. Thankfully, that small movement helped snap Lavi out of his trance, and he tried for a smile, which Kanda unconsciously returned. The red-head cleared his throat, announcing his name and the name of his monologue, before taking a bow and beginning. His voice wrapped around Kanda, and the words became real. So entranced was the black-haired teen, that he didn’t realize when everyone started to clap. Shaking his head, Kanda politely clapped, his eyes never once leaving his friend. Yes, he could consider Lavi a friend now, he supposed. Lavi collapsed into his chair, his legs shaking.   
“Never doing that again…” He muttered, shifting his eyepatch to rub his eyes.   
“You did fine. Don’t sweat it.” Kanda replied, casting a look at the directors in the back of the theatre. They were in heavy discussion, and then realized they still had everyone there.   
“Alright, thank you all for your time! You were our last set of auditions, and so we’ll post the casting tomorrow morning. You may leave.” One of the theatre teachers, Mrs. Anita stated, standing up to smile at the few students in the large room. The other theatre teacher, Cross, remained seated, looking rather bored. Lavi was the first on his feet, making a beeline for the door. Kanda rushed after him.   
Lavi didn’t stop till they were all the way at the other end of the school, near the doors to the parking lot.   
“What’s your deal?” Kanda asked, sounding harsher than he meant to.   
“Sorry, just nerves…” The red-head muttered, taking a deep breath. “I’m okay now. Promise.” He added, noticing Kanda’s disbelieving stink-eye. After a long moment, Kanda just shrugged, leaning against a locker.   
“Well warn me next time you’re gonna have nerves, would you?” That earned a grin and nod from the older teen. “We should probably get headed out, if you’re okay to drive now…” Lavi agreed, and led the raven-haired teen out to the Mustang.


	10. Chapter 10

 

               The loud chiming jerked him from his pleasant dreams. Blindly, Kanda reached over, fumbling for his cell phone on the nightstand. Flipping it open, he groaned. He still had almost an hour left he could sleep in. But, of course, he had to get a barrage of texts from Lenalee. Holding down his annoyance, he read them, yawning. They were all about the audition. And the last one froze Kanda’s blood.

_You both got in! Not in leading roles, but you’re in! The lead went to some new kid named Allen though._ Great, they were both in. He groaned and put the pillow over his head, wishing this were a dream. He didn’t want to actually be in the play… But he’d auditioned, and he wasn’t the lead. So, in retrospect, it could be worse. His phone dinged again, this time a text from Lavi.

_We made it! Congrats, bud! I’ll drive us to school today, if you want. In celebration!_ Kanda sighed and text back a quick reply ( _Congrats to you to. Sure._ ) and flopped back down to sleep more.

 

               The car ride to school was less than eventful. Neither of them really spoke, save for some words about Lena’s early texts. When they pulled into the lot, neither of them moved to get out of the car. That in itself was strange, since Kanda usually leaped out of the vehicle, to try to put distance between himself and Lavi. After a long moment of silence, Lavi cleared his throat.

“So, how about after practice tonight, we go out for some dinner, just us two. This wasn’t much of a celebration.” It seemed a strange request to Kanda, but he just shrugged.

“Sure, I know a nice little place downtown we can go to.” Lavi beamed, nodding.

“That’d be perfect! Should we go straight from practice, then?”

“Might as well. It’s not a super fancy place or anything. One of Tiedoll’s clients owns it.”

“Alright, perfect! So, it’s a date!” Lavi picked that word on purpose. Kanda’s face flushed, and he knew Lavi really meant it. It was a date.

The rest of the day, it was hard for Kanda to focus, he was too worried, and yes, excited, over rehearsal as well as the date. He spaced out in class, and got yelled at continuously. When class ended, he made his way to the theatre. Outside the door, there was a shock of white hair. Kanda stopped in his tracks, staring. The owner of the white hair was a young man. The new kid. The one who had gotten cast as Hamlet. Allen. That was his name. Something didn’t seem right about the kid, even though he looked friendly enough. Lavi sidled up behind him, following Kanda’s gaze.

“Is that the new kid then?” The voice shocked Kanda, and he jumped, heart pounding. Not only had Lavi scared him, he was also very close. Close enough, in fact, that Kanda could feel the heat coming off the red-head.

“I assume so.” He replied, shrugging. As they watched, Lena ran over to Allen, speaking to him low and excited. They were probably in the same class, even though Allen almost looked like an old man. Lena was a junior, and Kanda hadn’t seen the new kid in any of his classes. Finally, a rough bark came from inside the theatre and everyone jerked to attention. They started to file into the room, and Allen stood there biting his lip, looking anxious. Lena grabbed his hand and pulled him, whispering something to him.

“Oi, brat, what took you so long?” Cross growled, appearing behind Allen once everyone was backstage. Allen barely contained a flinch, looking up at the taller red-head.

“Sorry, Uncle. I was distracted.” Cross snorted, turning away from his… Nephew…? No wonder the kid was given the lead as a new kid. Oh well, not like Kanda really cared. All he cared about was he wasn’t the lead, that was enough for him. Mrs. Anita stood from her seat, rolling her eyes at her fellow theatre coach, before launching into a pretty speech about working together and making friends.

Finally. Rehearsal was done. Really, all it had been was getting scripts and figuring out who was who. Kanda gratefully grabbed his bag, all but running out of the theatre. He didn’t like crowds, and the amount of people who had insisted on shaking his hand and crowding around him had pushed him far over his limit. Thankfully, all he had left was his date with Lavi. Not that that was a small feat. He was catching his breath in the hall leading to the parking lot when Lavi caught up to him. The red-head looked tired, but he grinned none-the-less.

“Alright, time for dinner! You’re gonna have to give me directions!”

“It’s not that hard to find, but we have to park a few blocks away cause there’s never any parking.”

“That’s alright! We can walk!” Lavi started towards the doors, Kanda falling into step beside him. They chatted idly, mainly about all their other classes. They were both nervous, that much was clear.

Their idle chatter turned to Kanda giving directions as they drew further downtown. Finally, they reached a parking area, where Lavi found a space and parked. Kanda led Lavi down the street, making it 6 and a half blocks before pointing to a small restaurant.

“Sorry it’s such a walk, but there it is.” He was self-conscious now. This was so awkward, and yet he had to admit he was excited.

“It looks great! But no worries, it wasn’t that far of a walk!” Lavi grinned, taking Kanda’s hand and pulling him to the entrance. Kanda flushed bright red, and followed dutifully along. When they were inside, Lavi didn’t drop his hand, rather he just tightened his grip on the black-haired teen’s hand. He told the hostess that it was two for dinner, she glanced at their joined hands, and led them to a booth, grinning. They each slid into the booths, one of each side. They glanced over the menu, picking out what each of them wanted, and before long the waitress appeared, taking their order.

Dinner went well, surprisingly. They ate and managed to talk about things other than school. Kanda felt himself fall more in love with the red-head as the night went on. Likewise, Lavi got more and more relaxed. He still had his charm, but it was less forced. He wasn’t trying to make an impression, he was simply being Lavi, and that showed a considerable amount of trust, and yes, love. When they finished their meal, Kanda offered for Lavi to come over, since Tiedoll had made one of his signature pies. Of course, the red-head more than gladly accepted. Lavi insisted on paying the bill, since he was the one who asked him, and Kanda had no choice but to relent. Once that was paid, they started on their way back to the Mustang.

They were idly chatting, and not paying any attention. It was dark outside now, and the street lights weren’t very good at lighting the roads. The figure stalked them all the way from the restaurant, up until the block before. Lavi was just pulling his keys out, when he felt the sharp press of the barrel of a gun against his back.

“Don’t move a muscle.” The man hissed, his breath reeking of alcohol. Even Kanda was frozen, his gaze fixed on the gun. “Give me all your money and credit cards. NOW!” Lavi held up his hands, nodding his head slightly.

“I have to reach into my pocket to get it.” He spoke softly, shooting Kanda a look. At the approval of the robber, Lavi slowly reached into his pocket, taking his wallet in his hand and spinning, using his fist to punch the robber’s face, sending his stumbling back.

“Bastard!” The robber shouted, raising his gun and pulling the trigger.

It happened faster than either of them were aware. Kanda shoved Lavi aside, putting his body in front of the others. Three gunshots. One latched into Kanda’s shoulder, and the other two in his gut. He folded in on himself, collapsing on the ground. The would-be robber gasped, shocked at the blood pooling on the ground. And then he turned and ran. And Lavi was shouting. Shouting after the man, shouting at Kanda, shouting for help.

Everything sounded distant, like he had a cloth over his head. He was cold, too, and the edges of his vision were dark. What he could see was a stretch of pure white tiles, spotted with blood and lotus flowers and petals. There were feet in his line of view, small feet in red-stained sneakers. It was getting harder to breath. Suddenly, there were hands turning him, none too gently, picking him up. Something was fastened over his chest, and he wanted to fight, but moving was too hard. All he could see were the tiles, the blood, and the flowers. He couldn’t hear anything but muffled voices. And then, there was nothing.

Lavi’s shouting had managed to draw an old man. The man called 9/11, and the ambulance arrived pretty quickly. He could feel Kanda slipping away, and he didn’t try to stop the tears. He was trying his best to stop the bleeding, but there was so much blood. Too much. Lavi wasn’t a paramedic, but even he knew what happened when someone lost too much blood. The actual paramedics gently ushered Lavi aside, moving Kanda and then putting him on the gurney. They strapped him down and loaded him into the truck. Lavi bit his lip for a moment before he too jumped into the ambulance. He argued with the paramedics for a few moments, before the urgency of Kanda’s condition won out. They allowed the red-head to ride with them, wringing his hands anxiously. He was covered in Kanda’s blood, the pure red liquid coating his hands.


	11. Chapter 11

It only took them about 20 minutes to reach the hospital, and only about 5 of that was spent stabilizing Kanda. His condition was still dire, but at the very least, he was alive. That helped Lavi relax, but he kept his gaze fixed on the black-haired teen. It seemed impossible, but Kanda’s skin was even paler, a striking contrast against his raven hair. He looked pained, troubled. But that was no surprise, he’d just been shot. It hurt Lavi to see him like that, especially knowing those bullets were meant for him. The red-head chewed his lip all the way through the ride.   
When they reached the hospital, the staff rushed out, taking Kanda from the ambulance. They allowed Lavi to hurry along with them, until they reached the surgical suite. Lavi tried to argue, but he got shunned for his effort. Instead, he was told to clean up and wait. So that’s what he did. Only when he got to the waiting area, Tiedoll, Daisya, and Marie were there. Of course, Tiedoll was sobbing openly. He noticed Lavi and shuffled over, pulling the red-head into a tight hug, sobbing into his shoulder. Daisya was pale, but his emotions were well concealed. Even Marie looked distracted. The old man finally released Lavi, and pulled him over to sit down. Sitting was the last thing Lavi wanted to do, but Tiedoll insisted. They were all a jumble of nerves, silent but united in their concern for Kanda.   
It felt like years had passed before a doctor appeared. He wore a small smile, enough to tell them all Kanda was okay, before he even spoke.   
“He’s going to be okay. He lost a lot of blood, so he probably won’t wake up for a while, but we got two of the bullets out, the third went cleanly through.”   
“Thank you, Doctor.”   
“Yes, of course. We’ve got him situated, if you want to go check on him. Room 619.” And then he left. Lavi was the first out of the waiting area, Daisya following quickly. Tiedoll and Marie followed more slowly, but they still made their way to Kanda’s room.   
His face was still drawn and pale, but he wore an almost peaceful expression. Lavi sank into the chair beside Kanda’s bed, the tension easing out of him, leaving his exhausted. Tiedoll put a comforting hand on the red-head’s shoulder, smiling despite the tears on his cheeks. Kanda was alive. A little worse for the wear, sure, but alive. Exhaustion weighed down on Lavi, and his feelings of worry eased. Before too long, his eyelids drifted shut, and the red-head slept, slumped in the chair beside the raven-haired teen’s bed. 

Waves of heat were radiating off of three points in his body, warming his chilled limbs. Kanda kept his eyes closed, trying to get his body to adjust to the waves of heat. Along with the heat came pain. Every time he took a breath, pain blossomed in his shoulder and gut. The gentle beep of a heart monitor brought Kanda out of his thoughts, and he finally opened his eyes. It was bright, and the light reflected off the white sheets, walls, and curtains. Squinting against the brightness, the injured teen glanced around. Tiedoll and Daisya were slumped on the couch, Tiedoll sitting up with Daisya’s head in his lap. They had always been close, since Tiedoll had taken the teen from a horribly abusive situation. He couldn’t help but smile at his foster father and brother, rolling his eyes. The next thing he saw wiped that smile clean off his face. How Kanda hadn’t noticed the shock of red-hair earlier, he wasn’t sure. Chalk it up to the drugs. Lavi was tucked into his chair, legs curled up against his chest, feet pressed against the chairs arm. There was a light blue blanket draped over him, pulled up over his shoulders. There were dark red spots on his chin and neck, a few even spattered on his eyepatch. After a moment, the events of the previous evening came back to him, and his throat constricted. Those spots on Lavi were his blood. Without a thought otherwise, Kanda reached out, gently tracing his fingers over Lavi’s face and neck trying to wipe away the blood. Of course, the contact woke the red-head, who sat up with a jerk. Kanda retracted his hand quickly, flushing slightly and looking away from Lavi as the latter became aware of what woke him.   
“You’re awake!” Lavi chirped, louder than he intended. His voice was tight with worry, and he unfolded from the chair. The words woke Tiedoll, who shook Daisya awake.   
“Ya…” Kanda answered. His throat was dry, and talking didn’t feel too great. “Sorry.” What he was apologizing for, he wasn’t really sure. The injured teen glanced at his foster father, who was once again crying. Tiedoll did that a lot, and it never failed to annoy Kanda. Despite the tears on his cheeks, the man was smiling slightly, just glad his “son” was alive.   
“Don’t apologize, you didn’t do anything wrong.” Daisya cut in, trying to keep his voice light, but everyone could hear the relief in his words. Lavi remembered that the doctor asked to be informed when Kanda woke, and he puffed his cheeks out. Kanda avoided looking at the red-head, as he was still covered in blood.   
“I’m- Uh… I’ll go get the doctor… Let you talk a bit alone…” Lavi muttered, slipping out of the room before anyone could stop him. Tiedoll crossed to Kanda’s bedside, taking the chair Lavi had vacated.   
“Lavi told us what happened. That was very brave of you.” His foster father stated, brushing the bangs out of Kanda’s eyes. Normally, the teen would have slapped his hand away, but just then, he wasn’t feeling up to a fight.   
“I didn’t do it to be brave, I just wanted to defend my friend…” He muttered, closing his eyes and sighing. Daisya and Tiedoll exchanged a look. For Kanda to admit someone was a friend… They’d never heard it before.   
“Even so, it was amazing of you. Lavi hasn’t left your side all night, he’s been just as worried as I was.” Tiedoll leaned back in the chair, tension easing out of his shoulders. Kanda opened his eyes, staring at the ceiling.   
“… It wasn’t amazing, just my instinct… From my old home…” There was a long silence following that. Tiedoll knew part of the story, but he didn’t know all that had transpired inside the walls of the institution. Daisya didn’t know any of it, simply that Kanda had been taken out of a situation even worse than his own. Thankfully, the painfully awkward silence was interrupted when Lavi and a doctor swept in. The doctor shooed the others out, closing the door and shutting the blinds as he talked to and examined Kanda.   
When the doctor left, the police came. They wanted to know what had happened. They had Lavi’s report, but they needed Kanda’s as well. He relayed it as best he could, propped up on pillows so he was sitting up. His arm curled protectively over his stomach while he told it, describing the man’s face in detail. The police seemed on edge, casting Kanda weird looks the whole time.   
Lavi was getting a cup of coffee, when two cops approached, whispering. They got close enough for Lavi to hear their conversation, and it was surprising that he didn’t drop his cup then and there.   
“Ya, that’s the same one.”  
“Grown up a bit since that slaughter, huh?”  
“Without a doubt. Looks like he managed to put it behind him, even without a therapist.”  
“I’m surprised he didn’t just take this shooter down like he did his brother! The job he did on that other boy…”  
“Frankly, Jeff, I’m glad he didn’t take the shooter down. Last time he defended a friend… I still get nightmares about it!” Jeff was nodding, looking disturbed as the two walked away, out of earshot. Lavi was frozen, his nails biting into the Styrofoam of his cup. What had Kanda seen? What had Kanda done? They said something about a brother, but Kanda didn’t have a brother… Did he? Hot coffee spilling over his fingers finally woke the red-head from his horrified trance, and he cussed loudly- gaining quite a few disgruntled looks. A young woman hurried forward to clean up the spill, her name badge declaring her a member of the kitchen staff. Lavi apologized a few hundred times, but she just waved him off. He just got another cup of coffee and went back to the room.


	12. Chapter 12

Kanda was reading a packet when Lavi walked in, his brow furrowed as if he didn’t like the contents of the pages. He looked up, relieved to see Lavi in clean, blood-free clothes. His face was drawn and pale-even paler than it should have been. The red-head thought back to what he had overheard as he settled into the chair.  
“I would have brought you some, but I don’t think coffee is good for healing…” The 19 year old muttered stupidly.  
“I don’t like coffee, so it’s fine…” He carefully folded the papers, hiding the bold words across the top, and set them aside. “The cops left me with some reading in case I had free time…”  
“When can you leave?” Lavi blurted, turning red. Kanda tilted his head, raising an eyebrow slightly.  
“The doctor said I should be able to go home tomorrow, they just want to keep my overnight for observation.” He shrugged, the hospital gown slipping down his shoulder slightly. Angry red marks stretched down below the neckline, running up his collarbone and over his shoulder. Long, thin tendrils of raised, bright red skin. Lavi traced them with his eyes, drawn to the bright color against Kanda’s otherwise pale skin. He followed the other’s eyes and bit his lip, adjusting the gown to cover the marks.  
“So, I’m guessing acting in the school play is out of the question…?” Lavi muttered, trying to fill the awkward silence.  
“Most likely. I’ve been ordered not to go to school for at least a week, anyways, so I would miss a lot of practice…” Kanda leaned back, sighing. He looked tired, and not just from being shot.  
“Those cops knew you already, didn’t they?” Lavi blurted, fidgeting with the edges of his long sleeves. Kanda looked at him, eyes narrowed appraisingly.  
“You overhead something, didn’t you?” The red-head shifted, biting his lip.  
“I didn’t hear much… Just something about a brother and a slaughtering?” Emotions flashed through Kanda’s dark eyes, pain, betrayal, anger, depression. They vanished as soon as they came, leaving a carefully guarded expression.  
“Before Tiedoll took me in, the place I was at was attacked. Everyone was killed.” His tone was enough to let Lavi know it wasn’t an open topic, and the red-head dropped it. He opened his mouth to apologize for asking when Lenalee burst into the room. Her eyes were red and puffy, and her hair was a disheveled mess.  
“Lenalee…” Kanda greeted, eyeing her warily. Last time he’d made her this upset, she’d punched him in the chin so hard he lost a couple baby teeth. Rather than knock out any of his teeth (which Kanda was rather thankful for), Lenalee started crying, which Kanda was not thankful for. He didn’t know how to handle tears.  
“You… IDIOT!” She wailed, cupping her hands over her face. Lavi looked horrified, clearly unsure what to do. He and Kanda exchanged a look.  
“Glad you could stop by…” Kanda muttered, sighing. Lena dropped her hands and almost lunged forward, launching herself onto the bed, and by extension, on Kanda. He winced, the young ladies shoulder hitting his injured shoulder. She must have heard him suck in a breath, because she eased up slightly.  
“You just had to go and get yourself nearly killed again!” The black-haired girl sounded pissed, sticking out her lower lip in a pout. Lavi had to wonder what “again” meant; was this a habit of Kanda’s?  
“Hey, the last time before the pool was not my fault and you know it.” Kanda grumbled, rolling his eyes in exasperation. Yep, apparently he did make a habit of nearly dying.  
Lenalee spent the next hour talking, about what had happened at school that day, at play rehearsal, everything she could think of. Daisya poked his head in as she was starting to tell Kanda about the new theatre kid, Allen.  
“Hey, Lenalady! Sorry to interrupt, but Doc says Yuu needs rest, and Lavi’s gramps is here for him.” Lena stood gracefully, smiling at Daisya.  
“I was just about to leave anyways!” She lied, patting Kanda’s head like one would a dog, grinning, and sweeping out of the room. Daisya trailed after her, joking around with his friend. Lavi stood, stretching his legs out and reaching towards the ceiling, his back popping from being curled up too long.  
“I guess that means I gotta go…”  
“Guess so.” Kanda replied, avoiding looking at the red-head. After hearing what was being said at school, the black-haired teen felt awkward around Lavi. He didn’t care to be herald as a hero. After a moment’s hesitation, the tall ginger leaned over, gentling kissing Kanda on the cheek before straightening up and heading to the door.  
“I’m glad you’re okay. Thanks for what you did.” He muttered quietly, leaving the room before the other could respond.  
That night, Kanda was plagued by nightmares, tossing and turning in the hospital bed. He woke up drenched in a cold sweat, his wounds bleeding through the bandages. Sitting up, his head felt light, the room spinning around him.  
Yuu, come play with us! A child’s cheerful voice echoed around the empty room.  
It’s okay, you’re okay. We’re all a little strange here, don’t be scared to talk to us, okay Yuu? A gentle, comforting whisper.  
Yuu! Don’t you see what they’re doing to us! We have to stop them! The harsh, deranged voice grated the chilly air. His heart raced, the scar racing along his chest burned. His memories haunted him, rearing their ugly heads when he was vulnerable.  
Kanda drew his knees up to his chest, resting his forehead on his kneecaps. Breathing in through his nose, the teen tried to calm his heartrate. The fresh bullet wounds throbbed, though the bleeding had stopped. His old scars still burned, as if they were being freshly carved into his flesh. Why he was the sole survivor, he still didn’t know. The guilt haunted him. Why hadn’t he stopped his friend before it started? He didn’t have to tear the other down like he did. In the gloomy light from the street lamp outside his window, everything looked bloody, his hands, his sheets, the floor. Just like that night.  
His phone beeped on the bedside table, breaking his thoughts. Kanda was glad the doctors had given that back, but he wasn’t sure he wanted to talk just then. Irritated, he flipped it open, about to tell whoever messaged him off, but the message shone at him.  
Saw Lavi when we were leaving. Did something happen? He looked upset. From Marie. The screen light seemed to glare accusingly at him.  
I didn’t do anything. Maybe he just didn’t want to leave. Kanda text back, snapping the phone shut. Aside from the fact that it was 2 in the morning, he didn’t want to think about the red-head following the nightmares.  
The phone remained silent, and Kanda buried himself under the hospital blankets, staring at the ceiling. There were too many thoughts in his head, chasing each other around, he couldn’t catch a single one. Eventually, he drifted off to sleep once more, unplagued by nightmares this time.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I haven't updated in ages, sorry! I've been caught up with other stuff. And these chapters move kind of slow and awkwardly to me, so I had no motivation. But here they are~

When he woke, Tiedoll was talking to his doctor right outside the door. Daisya and Marie were on the sofa in his room, Daisya playing on his phone, Marie typing furiously on his company issue laptop. Kanda shifted in the bed, pushing himself up against his pillows. The bandages wrapped around his body were clean, making Kanda feel a bit self-conscious. Someone had changed them while he was still asleep.  
“What’s Tiedoll out there talking about?” The teen asked, his voice quiet, but grumpy. Daisya looked up and beamed, jumping to his feet.  
“About taking you home! The doctors have very specific orders for you until you come back in next week, since one of the bullets grazed your lung.” The spikey haired teen stated, glancing towards their foster father. “You better follow the orders, ‘cause he’s already stressed out about this enough.”  
“Why should he be stressed about it?! I’ll pay the bills myself, and it’s not like I’m dying…” Kanda pouted, folding his arms over his chest. Marie slapped the computer shut and stood, glaring down at his foster brother.  
“Because he loves and cares about you, and seeing you hurt worries him. It worries all of us. So behave.” His tone left no room for argument, though Kanda’s eyes did widen and he opened his mouth to reply, but no sound came out. Marie only spoke harshly when Daisya or Kanda were being a complete idiot. Sighing, the teen nodded, scowling at his hands.  
“Fine. I’ll be good.” Marie nodded, accepting it as a promise as the door slid open.  
“Yuu!” Tiedoll exclaimed, a brilliant smile lighting up his face. Kanda ground his teeth, as he always did when anyone called him Yuu. “You’re awake! Wonderful! Are you ready to go home?” His tone was hopeful, and Kanda knew he was thinking about the first time they met. Remarkably similar circumstances.  
“Ya, I want out of this place… And to wear some actual clothes.” He grumbled, not making eye contact with his foster father. He plucked at the hospital gown on his chest, glaring at the fabric in disdain.  
“Marie, would you bring the car around? I don’t think Yuu here fancies a ride across the parking lot in a wheelchair.” Now Tiedoll’s voice held a note of warning, directed at Kanda. He knew full well how much the teen hated being forced to ride in a wheelchair, and he figured he’d fight it. But the promise Kanda made echoed in the air around them, and he didn’t fight it.  
Soon enough, Kanda was dressed in a nice pair of jeans (wearing his own underwear underneath, and that was a relief if there ever was one) and a ratty old top. Tiedoll wheeled him down the hall to the elevator, Daisya walking along side with a bag of medicine, bandages, and the clothes Kanda was admitted in. As promised, Marie had brought the car around to the front door. Tiedoll helped Kanda out of the chair and into the back seat before taking the wheelchair back inside.  
As strange as it smelled, Kanda took a deep breath, enjoying the scent of his foster father’s van. The number of times he had avoided death was alarming, next time he doubted he’d be so lucky. Leaning his head back against the seat, he closed his eyes. The others settled into the van without a word, Tiedoll turning the radio on, keeping the volume low. By the time they pulled into the driveway, Kanda’s wounds were aching. He didn’t even object to Tiedoll helping him to his room.  
Kanda spent the majority of the day reading, trying to keep his mind off Lavi, school, the play, and the pain humming through his upper body. Occasionally Tiedoll or Marie would poke their head in, asking if he needed anything. Usually he didn’t. By the time night fell, Kanda was tired of being stuck in his room, but he knew better than to push his luck. It was well after midnight when he finally decided to try and get some sleep, setting the book aside and wiggling down under the covers. Sleep wasn’t long for coming, and surprisingly, he didn’t have any nightmares.


	14. Chapter 14

“I’m fine! I can go to school; it’s not like I have any physical classes today.” Kanda growled, leaning against the stair railing as Tiedoll blocked his path.   
“No you’re not.” Tiedoll replied, frowning. “You can barely stand, just take another day off, and we’ll see how you are tomorrow. Besides, the doctors said to keep from doing anything for at least three days, and no school for a week.” Kanda puffed out his cheeks, a¬¬¬rms folded over his chest. Tiedoll simply leveled a look at the hot-headed teen, and he deflated.   
“… Fine…” He grumbled, his legs shaking with the effort of holding himself up. Reluctantly, he let Tiedoll take his arm and lead him back up upstairs. He collapsed into his bed, biting the inside of his cheek to keep his emotions in check. Kanda didn’t like this at all, and he especially didn’t like the memories it brought back. Of Tiedoll carrying a small child up those stairs, laying him gently on this very bed… That small child being Kanda himself.   
Kanda huffed, rolling his eyes before shifting slightly, trying to turn his back on his adopted father. Tiedoll frowned, hesitating before giving up and leaving. Before he shut the door, he looked back at his son, reminding him that if he needed anything, he’d be home all day.   
And then Tiedoll was gone and Kanda was alone again. Alone with his thoughts. What a horrible place to be stuck.  
Right as he was getting ready to call Tiedoll up to bring him a book or something, his phone beeped. Kanda snatched it up, eagerly opening it. Talking to anyone was better than being stuck alone in silence.   
Yo. How you feeling today? It was Lavi. Instantly it felt like Kanda had a bullet lodged in his stomach. He glowered at the screen, trying to come up with a response. His mind kept playing back to the last time he’d see the other teen, when Lavi had kissed his cheek. His cheeks flared bright red, and he grunted in annoyance.   
Better. Bored. He shot back, intending it to be an invitation for Lavi to come by. Kanda was getting excited at the thought, and he shook his head to clear it. No. He couldn’t fall in love. Not possible.   
Ahahaha I can imagine! Want me to swing by after school? His heart rate picked up and he bit his lip.   
If you want to… It was not at all what he wanted to reply, but it’s what he ended up typing.   
Then I’ll see you after school! He stared at that text for a while, before heaving a sigh and laying back against his mound of pillows. This was either great, or really, really bad, and Kanda couldn’t decide which.


	15. Chapter 15

Time slows down when you’re waiting for something, until the final 20 minutes then it goes ultra-fast. This was the case when school got out and Lavi started over to Kanda’s house. Both boys were frantic in the final minutes, both worrying for separate reasons.   
Tiedoll answered the door, and then just waved Lavi up. It took everything in the red-heads power to keep from bounding up the stairs two at a time. He chewed his lip nervously as he knocked on Kanda’s door.   
“What do you want?” Kanda barked. Lavi cracked the door open.   
“It’s me. I brought your homework over too.”   
“Oh. Thanks.” Lavi took that as an invitation, sliding through the doorway and softly closing it behind him. He took a long moment to just study Kanda, who seemed to be doing the same to him. After a long moment, Kanda leaned back, relaxing against his pillows.   
“Did you have anything you wanted to do specifically?” He asked, causing Lavi to frown.   
“Not really, but you said you were bored, and I brought my tablet…” What was he suggesting exactly? Lavi had no idea at this point.   
“Tablet?” Kanda didn’t quite get it either. He arched an eyebrow, watching the red-head.   
“Ya, so we could watch a movie or something…”   
Kanda watched Lavi for a long while, considering. Finally, he shrugged, shifting in his bed so Lavi could either sit beside him, or if they put the tablet on the desk, he could see it.   
“Sure. Your choice of movie.” Lavi thought for a moment before deciding on one, quickly finding it on the tablet, plopping it on the foot of the bed, and settling next to Kanda. It was a squeeze, to have both boys on the bed, since it was only a full, but they did it.   
Part way through the movie (Finding Nemo), Kanda was struggling to keep his eyes open, his head lolling onto Lavi’s shoulder. Lavi, for his part, handled it pretty well. He flinched slightly at first, surprised at the contact. Then he just smiled at Kanda, wondering if the other would kick him out for playing with his hair.   
And then the situation came back to him and he started to panic slightly. He shook Kanda, waking him up. Of course, Kanda wasn’t happy.   
“What the hell?” He growled, blinking at Lavi.   
“Are you okay? You were falling asleep, are you feeling faint or anything?!”   
“You idiot… My pain meds make me drowsy.” He clicked his tongue, his eyes darting from Lavi’s face as his face flushed. Lavi dropped his hands away from Kanda, fidgeting awkwardly. The red-head glanced at Kanda’s shoulder, where one of the bullets had lodged itself.   
And the nice air they’d had previously vanished. Lavi scooted off the bed, chewing his lip.   
“S-sorry… I should let you rest then…” He muttered, stopping the movie. Kanda just watched him, trying to think of something to say. “I’ll come by again tomorrow if you’re feeling okay…” Since Kanda still didn’t reply, he beat a hasty retreat, closing the door with a soft click behind him.   
Kanda sighed, rubbing his face. Damn his lethargic brain, he should have said something. His heart had been rapidly beating since Lavi got there, and now it was just heavy and he felt bad. He slumped in his bed, glancing at the clock. It was 7:48 pm. Maybe he should go get some dinner… But he was pretty tired. Nap first, dinner second. And like that, he was out like a light.


	16. Chapter 16

The next day passed much like the previous one, only Kanda was feeling better, and therefore more restless. He paced the upstairs, much to Tiedoll’s disapproval. When school got out, Kanda waited by his phone for a text, but none came. To say he was disappointed would be an understatement. Lavi didn’t show.   
Daisya told Kanda over dinner that Lavi was strange. He was distant, and wouldn’t talk to anyone. Even when Daisya tried to talk to him, he stuttered a lame excuse and ran away. Kanda thought about that all night.   
He didn’t sleep. Tiedoll had said he could go to school the next day, and it buzzed through his mind all night. In the morning, Kanda rolled out of bed and showered, getting breakfast in his pjs while his hair dried.   
“Big day back.” Daisya yawned, strolling in to get some cereal. “You’re basically a hero, so you’re going to get swarmed. Don’t punch anybody again.” Kanda grunted, shoving toast in his mouth. He made no promises. “Seriously, you worry Tiedoll enough, don’t get suspended again.”  
“I won’t get suspended.” He replied, eyeing his brother. “If they crowd me too much, I’m going to make people back off, however I have to.” Daisya sighed, rolling his eyes.   
“Tell them. Don’t just punch them, dude.” He hesitated, watching his brother load toast into his mouth. “Of course, I could just. You know. Hang out around you all day and keep people back…” Kanda nearly choked on his toast in surprise. Daisya wasn’t the type to be nice to him.   
“You’ll get in trouble.” Kanda coughed out, taking a long drink of orange juice.   
“Nah, I’ll get pops to write a note, it’ll be fine.” As much as Kanda hated the idea of a shadow, he figured it wouldn’t hurt.   
“Alright. Fine… But only this once.” Daizya whooped, grabbed his cereal bowl, and raced out of the room to go find Tiedoll. Kanda finished up his toast, tossing the plate in the sink, before going upstairs to get dressed.   
He stood in front of his mirror, glowering at the bandages wrapped around his chest. The red scar stretched out from under the bandages, over his pale skin. Feelings of unease and anxiety crept in, causing Kanda to bite his lip hard enough to make it bleed. Maybe he shouldn’t go back to school yet. Maybe he could play the “never mind I don’t feel good anymore” card. And maybe Tiedoll would see right through that and send him anyways.   
With shaky hands, Kanda got dressed, leaving his hair hanging down his back. Pulling on his boots, he shuffled down to the kitchen where Daisya was waiting for him.  
“Ready?”   
“No.”  
“That’s the spirit!” He chirped, grabbing Kanda’s backpack (much to his annoyance) and skipping to the door. Kanda sulked out after him, wondering how anyone could be that cheerful when going to high school.   
They had to catch the bus, and the moment Kanda walked up the stairs, a strange hush settled over the kids. It was starting already. He bit the inside of his cheek and glowered at the ground, making his way to an open seat, Daisya plopping down beside him. Slowly, it started to get loud on the bus again. Some of the chatter was about Kanda, some of it homework, and some of it about who started to date who. It all set Kanda’s teeth on edge.   
He waited till everyone else to get off the bus, Daisya skipping alongside him. Kanda sulked through the halls, shoulders hunched, head down. Even so, he didn’t escape notice. People were staring, some even tried to speak to him. It was a relief when he got to his home room, slipping in the door 15 minutes before class with Daisya in tow. His teacher shrugged him and Daisya off, telling them to sit in the back, so they didn’t cause a scene.   
That’s how most of the morning went. Students tried to crowd him, Daisya kept them off, and the teachers didn’t seem to care much. Of course, they were glad he was okay, but aside from that, they didn’t say much about the incident.   
Lunch rolled around and most of the seniors dispersed to go off campus. Kanda and Daisya instead started looking for Lavi. They found him in the library, alone in a secluded corner. The moment he saw them, he hid his book and started stammering an excuse to leave. Kanda tried to catch up to him, but his chest started to burn after only a couple minutes jogging. And of course, that was enough to convince Daisya that Kanda was better off at home.   
Kanda protested, but nonetheless, Tiedoll showed up to take the teen home for the rest of the day. He paced the house, grumbling under his breath for hours, until Daisya got home.   
“Dude, just text him if you’re that annoyed.” Daisya said when Kanda asked if he’d talked to Lavi.   
“He won’t talk to me face to face, why would he text me back?” The teen growled, grinding his teeth.   
“Well, he might. Besides, you can spam him if he doesn’t reply.”   
“There’s something wrong with you…” Kanda sighed, rubbing his shoulder. Daisya just laughed, stapling his finger to a piece of cardboard.  
Letting loose a long string of curse words that would have Tiedoll crying if he were there, the soccer-player bolted to the bathroom. Kanda snorted, rolling his eyes. He flipped his phone opened and stared at it. What should he even say? Just “hi”? That didn’t seem like it would work. Just as he was getting ready to chuck the device at the fridge, it vibrated, signaling a new text. Kanda clicked it open before he saw who sent it.   
Sorry about not coming over yesterday, I have a huge project for Gramps. Speak of the devil and so he responds. Not exactly what he was expecting, though.   
I see.  
Sorry. Maybe we can do something when I’m finished.   
I could always help you with it, since I’m stuck with nothing to do… That was a risky one.   
That’s okay, Gramps wants me to do it alone What a bad excuse… Then Kanda realized, it’s the same thing he usually does. Avoidance. He flipped the phone shut and stared at the counter.   
“Alright I don’t think I ripped too much flesh off my finger- Why are you glaring at the counter? Did it offend you or something?” Daisya strolled back into the kitchen, arching an eyebrow at his foster brother.   
“It’s nothing.”   
“Uh-huh, and I’m a princess.” Daisya replied sarcastically, leaning his hip against the counter. “What’s up Grumpy McGrumpface?” Kanda actually hissed at him.   
“Just leave off.” He wasn’t good at clever nicknames. “I have homework to do.” And that was the end of that. He retreated up to his bedroom, settling at the desk with a packet of homework in front of him.   
Kanda sat there for hours, but didn’t manage to get any of his homework done. It wasn’t hard, his mind was just elsewhere. Around 11, he finally gave up, stashing it away in his bag again and getting ready for bed.   
As he was getting in bed, he got another text. Grumbling, he got his phone off his desk. It was from Lavi.   
Hey, are you still awake?   
Yes I am. Why?  
Do you maybe want to come over tomorrow? Help me with my project?   
I thought you had to do it alone but sure I’ll come over after school   
And there was no reply after that. Kanda was thoroughly confused by now. What was Lavi doing? He shook his head, plugging the phone into the charger, and climbing into his bed.   
That night he was plagued by nightmares, of Lavi, his old friends, and the recent shooting. When his alarm finally went off, he wasn’t rested at all. That fact made Tiedoll force him to stay home. Kanda still didn’t sleep, but Tiedoll tried.   
Finally, school ended. When Daisya got home, Kanda walked down to Lavi’s house. The red-head looked like he hadn’t slept at all either. He ushered Kanda into the living room, telling him not to step on any books. That was a hard instruction to follow. Books were strewn everywhere, pulled off the shelves lining the walls and thrown haphazardly into ready-to-collapse stacks (quite a few already did collapse). Kanda perched himself on the couch, picking up the nearest book as Lavi went to get them water. It was a book all about volcanic eruptions. Not exactly what Kanda read for fun.   
“Sorry it’s a mess, Gramps is on a trip, and I’m supposed to finish this assignment before he gets back…” Lavi said, setting the water glasses down in the only spot on the coffee table.   
“What exactly is this assignment?” Lavi heaved a sigh, pushing his bangs back off his forehead. His eyepatch was a deep purple today, to match his jeans, while he wore a light grey t-shirt.   
“Gramps wants me to map all the volcanic eruptions over the past 100 years and try to predict the next one.”   
“… Why…? That’s insane!” Lavi shrugged, picking up a book thicker than his arm.   
“Maybe, but it’s not a bad idea to look at. I wanted your help plotting the map, if you’re okay with that…”   
“Ya, sure. Just give me the points and I’ll plot it.” Kanda raised an eyebrow at the red-head, who had barely even looked at him since he entered the house. Lavi laid out a map, bringing out a list of places and coordinates for him before scampering off to who knows where.   
It took a couple of hours, but Kanda got the map complete. Lavi had come to check on him a couple of times, but for the most part the red head had remained absent.   
“Lavi! I’m done!” Kanda shouted down the hall, hoping that would summon him. He had had butterflies in his stomach at the invitation into the house, but they had quickly burned out when he realized Lavi was nervous and fidgety. Something was wrong, but he had no idea what. Lavi barreled into the room at high speed, skidding to a stop.   
“Really?! Great! That’s a huge help!” Kanda narrowed his eyes at the other. Lavi was shifting his weight, gaze looking at everything but Kanda, his hands stuffed in his pockets.   
“Ya, of course. Anytime.”   
“But it’s late now so you should go home before Tiedoll worries about you.”   
“Ya, I was just about to.” He shrugged, grabbing his messenger bag off the couch and heading towards the door. He suddenly stopped right by Lavi, tilting his head to the side. “Did something happen? You’re being weird.” Lavi flinched but rolled his eye and brushed his hair out of his face.   
“Nope, just fine. Gramps being away makes me nervous, but otherwise everything’ s just fine.” And that was it, his tone left no room for further comment, so Kanda just continued on, showing himself out.   
Lavi slumped in the couch, sighing and rubbing his face with the heels of his palms. What the hell was wrong with him? He couldn’t even look at Kanda anymore. After beating himself up mentally for about 20 minutes, Lavi shuffled his way upstairs to get ready for bed. Maybe he’d skip school tomorrow, since Gramps would be back soon and he really needed to finish the assignment…


	17. Chapter 17

The next day, Lavi did skip school. He stayed home and worked on the volcano research, only leaving to go buy another book. When he drove by Kanda’s house, he noticed the other boy carefully tending to his garden, deeply focused. He didn’t see Lavi.   
He withdrew into himself, quitting the school play, sitting in the back of class, ignoring most people’s requests to chill. The only one he didn’t ignore was Lenalee, and by extension, Allen. Lena and Allen had picked up a quick and easy friendship, which had quickly turned (much to Komui’s dismay) into more. Lena almost always questioned why Lavi wouldn’t talk to, or even about, Kanda anymore, since they’d seemed to hit it off, but Lavi never answered. He’d just shut down.   
This went on for the rest of the semester, and well into the second semester.   
Kanda didn’t know why Lavi stopped talking to him. It hurt. One moment, the red-head asked him on a date, the next he wanted nothing to do with him. For the life of him, Kanda couldn’t figure it out. What had changed? Did he do something? It was a mystery. Not even Lenalee or her boyfriend knew. Daisya stopped mentioning it when he saw how much it affected Kanda. Tiedoll was worried. Kanda had always been isolated, but he became even more so. For the first couple months, his grades plummeted, he didn’t go to school, and he refused to talk to any of them. Marie had finally snapped him out of that slump, and life had gone on, without Lavi.  
Until it didn’t.


	18. Chapter 18

School assemblies always sucked. This one though? This one took the cake. They were given numbers and had to find their partner for a Senior Agility Course. It was supposed to be a series of fun games, but last year, they’d had to call the ambulance for multiple kids, since high schoolers take games far too seriously.   
This year, however, Kanda got to participate. Although, he almost wished he wasn’t allowed. He’d finally gotten over Lavi, and here they were, being handed matching jerseys. Yep. Of course. Kanda’s teammate had to be Lavi.   
Lavi wasn’t any happier about it. With only a little over a month left of school, Lavi had been fighting to put everything behind him so he could leave the moment he graduated. And now here he was in close quarters with Kanda once more. He could smell the slight aroma of potting soil and flowers from the other, and it was making his heart pound.   
Kanda could smell the dusty library and the other’s cologne, he was so close to the red-head. His jaw was clenched tight, and it was a shock his teeth weren’t fracturing. The teacher handed them what they needed and dismissed them. Unfortunately, they didn’t have long to come up with tactics, so they had to talk that day.   
They had the same idea without saying anything. They retreated to the theatre section of the library and sat in silence for a long while.   
“So…” Lavi started, clearing his throat awkwardly. “I hear this is brutal?”   
“Ya.” Kanda replied, trying to keep the emotions out of his voice. “Last year 16 kids were injured.”  
“And they’re still doing it?!”   
“They tried to cancel it, but it’s tradition and everyone protested.” Kanda rubbed his cheek, eyeing a nearby poster. “Anyways, let’s make a plan.” Lavi fell silent for a while, frowning in thought. When he spoke again, it was about the events, formulating a plan.   
With that awkward day behind them, Kanda locked himself in his room. He flopped onto his bed, sighing heavily. His heart hadn’t stopped pounding since they matched their cards, whether out of rage or something else, he wasn’t sure. One thing he knew for sure: he was still hopelessly crushing on Lavi.   
Even Lavi was completely spent from the day, hiding himself away in his room. Gramps didn’t push it, he’d figured out not to after he got back from his trip and Lavi had snapped at him.   
The teams had two weeks to plan, and none of that time went any better. Their meetings were awkward, forced. They never stayed longer than necessary, and ran away as soon as possible. Lenalee and Allen were partners by some magical force, and despite Komui’s hovering, they spent most of their two weeks shut away in Allen’s house, so neither Kanda nor Lavi could get help from them. Daisya was even less help. His advice to Kanda (even though Kanda didn’t ask) was to “kiss and make up”. He got a black eye for that.   
It was 2 days till the competition. Kanda’s nerves were running high, and being in close quarters with Lavi wasn’t helping. They were each reading a book on war strategy, Kanda reading about Ancient Rome, Lavi about the Mongols. Either Daisya had really bad timing, or he knew it would make things even worse. Either way, Lavi’s phone beeped, and a text from Daisya flashed across the screen.   
Yo, come to dinner tonight. Pops wants to celebrate before the tournament. Kanda read it upside down and then bit his lip. Lavi eyed Kanda for a second before sliding open the phone and replying.   
Ya sure! I’ll bring some pie too! And that was that.   
“Tch…” Kanda clicked his tongue, his grip on the book tightening.   
“Hm?” Lavi looked as innocent as possible. It set Kanda’s heart racing, and he felt heat in his cheeks.   
“Nothing. I’m going home.” He growled, slamming the book shut (earning a glare from the librarian) and standing. Lavi stood too.   
“Hey, wait, we’re not done for today.” The red-head blocked the other’s way, hands on his hips.   
“We are now. Move.”   
“Not going to happen. We’re going to finish making plans and then you can leave.” It was something about Lavi’s tone, that really set Kanda off. Thinking back on it, he has no idea what, but something did.   
“Ya, like you left after the last time we had plans.” He snarled, fists at his sides. “You finished playing with what you wanted to play with, and you just left.” Lavi reeled back, blinking at the shorter.   
“What are you talking about?” Of course, Lavi already knew. He knew very well.   
“Don’t play an idiot!” Kanda lashed out, fist connecting with Lavi’s cheek. The red-head stumbled, and Kanda pushed past him, making for the parking lot. Once he was outside, he could run, and Lavi wouldn’t be able to catch him. Unfortunately, Lavi did catch him, before he was even outside.   
“Hey! Stop! What’s your deal?!”   
“What’s my deal!?” Kanda threw another punch, but Lavi caught his wrist this time, glaring at him. “I’m not the one who just left. I’m not the one who just decided to stop talking, who ran away multiple times! You don’t get to try to order me around, especially when you won’t even fucking talk to me!” Kanda was shouting by now, and thankfully the school was pretty empty or they’d have a crowd.   
Lavi’s gaze softened, and he chewed his lip for a moment. He looked almost sad, refusing to look at Kanda.   
“You won’t even look at me anymore.” Kanda snarled, yanking his hand out of Lavi’s grip.   
“Sorry.” Lavi replied quietly, looking at the ground.   
“Shut up. I’m not working with you.” He turned to leave but Lavi grabbed his wrist again.   
“I’m sorry Kanda. I was stupid, still am. I panicked, you got hurt because of me and I just. Freaked!” His words were rushed, and he finally met Kanda’s gaze, his eye pleading. “I thought you’d hate me cause it’s my fault you got shot and I didn’t want to make you hate me by staying there and making you relive that and I figured you didn’t care and I’m really sorry!” His gaze dropped again and he bit his lip. Lavi’s eyes were burning with tears, but he wouldn’t cry then and there.   
“You really are an idiot!” Kanda shouted, yanking his arm free. “I wouldn’t have defended you if I didn’t like you! It was my choice, numbskull!” Lavi blinked up at the other, opening his mouth to reply. But Kanda wasn’t done yet. “Why the fuck would having you around make me hate you?! Leaving is what made me hate you! I don’t give two flying fucks that I got hurt! I’m not going to “relive” it just because you’re nearby! Who gave you the right to make choices for me?!” His voice had taken on a strained tone, and he almost looked ready to cry. That or he wanted to strangle Lavi. Or both.   
“I…” Lavi took a step back, looking like a scorned child. “I guess I didn’t really think about that…”   
“No. You didn’t.” Kanda hissed, scowling. Lavi took a deep breath, plowing on before losing his nerve.   
“I felt guilty cause if it hadn’t been for me you wouldn’t have been hurt and I was scared to ask you if you were mad or anything and then when I heard those cops talking about another time I just felt horrible that you’d been hurt again and I didn’t think.” He gasped in a breath after pouring all that out, shifting his weight from foot to foot. He figured Kanda would yell, or hit him, or maybe even just leave. But never, in his life, would he expect Kanda to close the small gap between them, and hug him.   
“You are such an idiot!” Kanda grumbled into Lavi’s shoulder, face burning. The red-head wrapped his arms around the other, blinking back tears.   
“So… Then, you don’t hate me…?”   
“No, I don’t.” Kanda drew back, raising an eyebrow at the other. “But I do want to punch you.” Lavi smiled, tears leaking out of his eyes. They broke out of the hug, Kanda turning his back on his once more friend.   
“You already punched me earlier, so no, you don’t get to again.” They started towards the doors, not sure where they were going. “Although there is something I want to do.”  
“Ya? What’s that?” No quicker was it out of Kanda’s mouth than Lavi grabbed his arm again, this time spinning him around and leaning in. He wore a shit-eating smirk and Kanda only had a second to worry before Lavi kissed him.   
“Man, I’ve been wanting to do that forever!” Lavi whooped, oblivious to the state he’d put Kanda in. His blood was rushing to his face, and his mind shut off. So he did the only logical thing. Kanda punched Lavi in the gut. “What was that for!?”  
“Warn me next time asshole!”   
“So… There will be a next time? You’re not mad?” Lavi waggled his eyebrow, eye sparkling, with that shit eating grin still on his face. It took everything in Kanda to not punch him again.   
“Maybe. If you stop being such an idiot.” He grumbled, blushing deep red, refusing to meet the others eye.   
“No promises, but I can try~” Lavi grinned, throwing an arm over Kanda’s shoulders. As much as he wanted to shove him off, he couldn’t bring himself to. It was actually almost nice, the physical contact. They finally separated when they reached the mustang. Kanda slid into the passenger seat, feeling the familiar butterflies that always seemed to settle in when he was with the charming teen.   
They pulled up in front of Kanda’s house, and he started to fumble with his seat belt. Lavi had a moment’s thought before he leaned over, grabbing Kanda’s chin and pulling his face in, kissing him again.   
“… You’re an idiot…” Kanda muttered, trying not to grin like an idiot (aka: like Lavi was). He finally got his seatbelt undone, and threw open the door. “Are you still coming to dinner?”   
“Wouldn’t miss it~” Lavi chirped, grinning brightly. Kanda nodded and stepped out of the car, closing the door gently behind him and trudging to the front door. He glanced over his shoulder, smiling slightly at Lavi before the red-head pulled the mustang away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *insert shrug emoji here*


	19. Chapter 19

Immediately, Daisya was on him, firing off questions.   
“We talked, everything’s fine.” Kanda barked, cutting the flow off. Daisya pursed his lips, eyeing his foster brother.   
“Looked more than fine from where I was sitting.” Oh how he wanted to punch the soccer player… But he couldn’t, Tiedoll would kill him, so he settled for stalking past him and closing himself in his room. He flopped on the bed, trying to make sense of the day.   
When Lavi showed up for dinner, Kanda still hadn’t really figured anything out, but that didn’t really matter. Marie knocked on his door, motioning downstairs. Kanda rolled his shoulders back and sauntered down the stairs, giving Lavi a once over before going into the dining room. Lavi broke off from his conversation with Daisya to trot after the other, grinning brightly.   
Kanda sank into his usual chair, blinking up at his red-head, butterflies in his stomach. Lavi leaned over, giving Kanda a quick kiss on the cheek before settling into the chair next to him. Kanda flushed, swatting at Lavi’s leg. Daisya, of course, saw it all. The soccer player sat in his chair across from his brother, smirking. Kanda flipped him off.   
“Yuu! That’s not very polite.” Tiedoll was aghast, having walked in the room just in time to see that.   
“I know.” He grumbled, his hands in his laps. Lavi reached over under the tablecloth, and pried one of Kanda’s hands away, twining their fingers together. Tiedoll was oblivious, but Daisya and Marie knew exactly what the other boys were doing. Kanda felt a heat rush up his neck, his ears turning red.   
“Ya, Yuu! You should be politer. Like maybe saying hi to your boyfriend.” Daisya teased, earning another bird. Tiedoll blinked, unsure if he heard them right. He was walking around the table to take his seat, and he noticed their hands clasped together. He’d known for a long time that Kanda was bi, but he never dreamed of Kanda getting with Lavi. Tiedoll took his seat, tilting his head to the side.   
“So, Yuu, is there a story here?”   
“Not really.”   
“Oh? You two just went from not talking to holding hands at the dinner table just like that?”   
“Pretty much.” Lavi hid his laugh under a cough, rolling his eye. “Blame him.” Kanda pointed to the red-head, trying to hide his blush. Lavi just grinned.   
“We finally actually talked, and got things worked out~” Lavi chirped, ignoring Daisya’s snort.   
“Obviously.” Daisya barked, grabbing a roll from the center plate.   
“Daisya! Don’t just grab your food!” Tiedoll frowned at his son. “I’m glad to hear everything’s worked out, you two.” He smiled kindly at his son and his boyfriend, clapping his hands together. “But now, let’s not waste more words! Let’s eat!” Daisya roared his approval and grabbed the closest plate of food, heaping fries onto his own plate.   
They ate dinner and then retreated to the family room, Kanda and Lavi settling side by side on the couch. Kanda leaned his head on Lavi’s shoulder as they turned on Treasure Planet. Lavi put his arm over the black haired teens shoulders, pulling him closer. Thankfully, Daisya had run upstairs to play a game online with his soccer team, so he wasn’t there to mock them. Marie was working on a thesis, and Tiedoll was cleaning up after dinner.   
Kanda would never admit how much he loved this moment, or how tired he was. He wouldn’t ruin it, he wanted Lavi to stay. They were silent, but just the contact was enough. Lavi ran his fingers over Kanda’s shoulder, raising goosebumps. Kanda shifted in his seat, glancing up at his boyfriend. Lavi grinned down at him, catching his chin and leaning down. Their lips met and the movie was totally forgotten. When they finally finished the kiss, Kanda was light-headed, and he couldn’t keep from smiling, resting his head on Lavi’s shoulder again.   
Unfortunately, the movie ended. Far too soon for Kanda’s liking, but it was pretty late. He stretched as he got up, trying to ignore how Lavi watched him, almost hungrily.   
“You should probably head home…” Kanda muttered, watching Lavi’s hands as the gripped his own.   
“Probably.” Lavi agreed, pulling Kanda into him and kissing him.   
“What is with you and kissing?” Kanda muttered, looking at their feet, trying to hide the blood rushing to his face.   
“I’ve been wanting to kiss you for ages, and now I can. Besides, I figured if you didn’t like it, you’d punch me in the gut again.” His voice was low, his breath brushing against Kanda’s ear.   
“Well… You’re not wrong.” Kanda admitted, shrugging slightly. He’d wanted to kiss the red-head since day one, so he couldn’t really argue any of that logic. “But it is late, so you should probably get going… Before your gramps comes looking for you.”   
“Ya, you’re right… Walk me to the door?” Lavi tilted his head to the side, raising his eyebrow. Kanda shrugged.   
“Sure.” Lavi grabbed his jacket as they headed to the door. They stood on the porch, Kanda examining his garden.   
“Are we going to work more on getting that race thing all figured out?”   
“Oh, ya, we need to work on that… I think Tiedoll works tomorrow at noon, if you want to come over then. Daisya has his soccer club meet up and Marie’ll be at work.” Lavi’s face lit up.   
“That’d work! I can even bring over lunch!” Lavi chirped, wrapping an arm around Kanda’s waist.   
“Sure.” He muttered, leaning against the other’s chest. “But you better get going so we can sleep some before that.” His words didn’t really match up with how he was leaning against his boyfriend, but Lavi didn’t mind.   
“Probably…” They lapsed into silence, standing together for the better part of 10 minutes before Lavi sighed and pulled away. “I’ll see you tomorrow?” At Kanda’s nod, he leaned in, gave him one last kiss, “a goodnight kiss”, and then went home. Kanda went inside, flopping on his bed. Tomorrow would certainly be interesting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This thing always screws with my format for some stupid reason *shrug emoji*


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aight, aight, sorry for no updates or anything?? I've been in a weird place mentally, plus things have been super busy and hectic so I haven't wanted to write much. But here's more!! And I'll try to update at least weekly, if I can, since things are kinda stabilish.

The doorbell went off for the third time before it finally woke him. He was still half asleep, so Kanda wandered down the hall, going to see who was at the door, in just pj pants. Peering through the peephole, he cursed. It was Lavi, over to continue planning for their event. But of course, since he’d been waiting for a while, Kanda couldn’t run him off. Reluctantly, he opened the door, conscious of his bare chest.  
“My alarm didn’t go off.” Were the first words out of his mouth, since Lavi raised an eyebrow.  
“Good thing your doorbell is loud…” Lavi was distracted, but when his eyes landed on Kanda’s shoulder, he frowned. He shook his head after a moment and held up a bag from the grocery store. “Doughnuts and stuff for hamburgers!” Kanda opened his mouth to say that sounded good, but his stomach answered for him, growling loudly. Lavi tried to disguise his snort with a sneeze.  
“I need to take a shower, make yourself at home.” He muttered, padding towards the stairs. Lavi’s mind went straight to the gutter, but he shook his head, rolling his eye.  
“Alright, I’ll set up in the kitchen.”  
20 minutes later, Kanda came downstairs, wet hair pinned up in a bun, fully clothed. “Give me a doughnut.” He sauntered into the kitchen, stretching his arms over his head. Lavi held out a doughnut and Kanda snatched it, devouring it quickly.  
“So… I was watching videos from previous years, and I think we’ll be pretty good as long as nobody gets in our way.”  
“And that’s exactly what they’re going to do.” He snorted, rolling his eyes. Lavi pouted.  
“Then we just have to teach them not to do that. If they get in the way, we kick them.”  
“… That’s not a bad idea actually…”  
“But I doubt anyone will get in your way, your glare could freeze a volcano!” Lavi leaned back, grinning. Kanda frowned, putting his hands on his hips.  
“Isn’t that usually a bad thing?”  
“Not when it gets people out of our way~” Lavi chortled, blinking at his boyfriend.  
“… That’s fair.” Kanda nodded, snatching a second doughnut. “But if you’ve got all that figured out, why did we need to plan?”  
“Can’t a guy just want to spend time with his boyfriend?!” Lavi mocked insult, putting his hand over his heart widening his eye. Kanda snorted and rolled his eyes again, trying not to smile.  
“You’re an idiot.”  
“Ya, but I’m your idiot!” He stood, crossing to give Kanda a kiss on the cheek. “Actually, I thought we could watch movies today, unless you wanted to go out somewhere.” Kanda raised an eyebrow, taking a bite of the doughnut.  
“Stay in.” He replied, pointing to the family room. “TV’s still in there though, no use standing around the kitchen.”  
“Roger that!” Lavi laughed, grabbing Kanda’s hand and pulling him along to the couch, plopping down and trapping Kanda on his lap. “Anything particular you want to watch?”  
“Not really…” Kanda muttered, biting his lip, feeling the blood rushing up his neck. Why did Lavi always do things to make him blush? Did he just know or something? Probably.  
“Righto, channel surfing it is!” Lavi grabbed the remote and turned the TV on, flicking through the channels.


	21. Chapter 21

Of course, it was just their luck that the remote batteries died right after changing to a local news channel.  
“Dammit…” Lavi growled as Kanda stood up, holding his hand out.  
“I’ll grab new ones.” He reluctantly handed the remote over, pouting.  
“Right when we were getting comfortable…” Kanda vanished into the kitchen, pulling open a cabinet. While he searched through the cabinet, it was quiet enough for the news broadcaster to be heard. 

“In other news, the abandoned building that once held Chang Orphanage is scheduled for demolition. It’s been left alone and abandoned as a tribute to the children slaughtered there, but unfortunately, the land has been bought out.” There was a crash from the kitchen. Kanda had dropped the remote, a pack of batteries, and a glass bowl. He was frozen, staring into the cabinet, eyes wide.  
“Kanda?” Lavi hopped off the couch, peeking into the kitchen. “Kanda, are you okay?” He didn’t reply. Lavi glanced at the shattered bowl, biting his lip. It had, of course shattered around Kanda’s bare feet, and there was no good way to move the teen without risking him stepping on the shards. Not to mention the nice slice on his foot, bleeding heavily. “Jesus… Kanda, snap out of it!” Lavi took a step closer, eyeing the shards. He reached out, grabbing Kanda’s arm. The black-haired teen flinched, blinking rapidly. 

“Lavi…” He muttered it, closing his eyes and drawing in a deep breath.  
“Ya, I’m here, idiot. What’s wrong?” Kanda shook his head, reaching out to put a steadying hand on the cabinet. “Is it the news…?” This time he nodded, eyes still screwed shut. “That orphanage? Was that yours…?” Again, a nod. Lavi sucked in a breath. What those cops had said in that hospital came back to him. Survived that slaughter… What he did to that boy… Lavi watched Kanda breathing in and out, trying to get his mind out of whatever horror it lingered in. The news had moved onto the weather. 

“I’m fine.” Kanda breathed out, his shoulders shaking slightly.  
“No, you’re not.” Lavi immediately called him out on that, putting one hand on his hip. “Talk to me, Kanda. It doesn’t do any good to bottle it up.”  
“I’ll be fine.” Lavi snorted, which earned a glare from Kanda. It was a step forward at least, Kanda had looked at him. It helped to ground him to the present, out of the horrific past.  
“I don’t care if you’ll be fine, I want you to talk to me. I want to help you.” Kanda rolled his eyes, finally coming back to his senses. He was still shaking and unsteady, but his mind was there. The first thing he noticed was the blood on his foot. He hissed in a breath, taking a large step away from the shards. Lavi took a step forward, catching Kanda as he stumbled slightly. He helped him into a chair and went to find a rag for his foot. 

When Lavi got back, Kanda had his forehead against the cool granite counter. He got the rag wet and started to wipe his foot off, being gentle and slow.  
“It was a last-chance orphanage, for kids who either weren’t wanted or who’d been adopted and then brought back… I was the latter.” Kanda’s voice was barely audible, and Lavi froze at first. “The people who adopted me at first, they said I was strange. Guess I am. But they brought me back and I got shipped to Chang Orphanage.” Lavi grabbed the gauze pad he’d found and carefully lined it along the gash before wrapping it with an Ace bandage. Kanda winced, but whether it was his foot of memory, Lavi wasn’t sure. “I made friends with these twins there. Alma and Karma. We were all the same age, and we’d all been brought back for being strange.” He sat up, cracking his neck as he looked at the ceiling. Talking about this was clearly draining something out of him. Lavi almost told him it was okay; he didn’t need to talk.  
“What happened to them?” He asked instead, quietly. 

“I killed them.” Those words were heavy, and Kanda’s shoulders sagged. “Or, Karma at least. He killed her, and I killed him.” Lavi’s mouth dropped open and he stared. “Karma was pretty paranoid, he thought the people running the orphanage were experimenting on us. They were doctors, after all. Unfortunately, they trusted their kids too much, and Karma found a couple swords. He went mad. Alma was the first down, since she tried to reason with him.” Kanda put his hand over his shoulder, rubbing the scar that stretched across his skin. “The rest didn’t stand a chance. He just slaughtered them all, including the couple running the place…”  
“But you stopped him?” Lavi prompted, chewing the inside of his cheek.  
“Ya.” He lapsed into silence, obviously done with his story. Lavi exhaled a long, slow breath. 

“I’m so sorry…” Kanda just shrugged, shaking his head. His shoulders slumped, and he looked at his hands, folded in his lap. Lavi hesitated a moment before gently taking one of Kanda’s hands. The black-haired teen flinched slightly, but he didn’t pull his hand away- rather he gripped Lavi’s hand. “Do you still want to watch a movie…?” The red-head asked gently, glancing at the remote and batteries. The remote had gotten blood on it, but the batteries seemed fine.  
“… If you still want to…” Kanda replied, the excitement he’d felt before slowly creeping back in over his memories. He was also shocked- even after finding out that, Lavi still wanted to touch him, still wanted to date him. 

“Let me get the remote~” Lavi’s voice was calming, and he placed a quick kiss on Kanda’s head before liberating his hand and grabbing the piece from the floor, taking it to the sink to wipe it off. Once it was clean, he got some fresh batteries and shoved the remote in his pocket. Kanda was trying to stand, wincing at the pain is his foot. The gash was deep, and feet injuries always tended to hurt quite a bit. “Here, let me help you.” Lavi offered, holding out his arm. Kanda shot him a look before leaning against him, wrapping an arm around his boyfriend’s middle, leaning into the red-head. Lavi put his hand against Kanda’s hip, helping him to the couch.  
Kanda sank gratefully into the cushions; his attack having left him at low energy. He reached up and pulled the bun out of his hair, letting the still damp strands fall around his shoulders. Lavi flipped the tv on to HDMI 1 and grabbed a movie, putting it in and settling down beside his boyfriend, slinging an arm over his shoulders. Kanda leaned into Lavi, his eyelids heavy. It didn’t take long for Kanda to slip into unconsciousness, his sleep easy and dreamless.


	22. Chapter 22

Lavi’s voice was the first thing that registered. The next was the warm lap under his head. The third were his memories. Kanda blinked his eyes open, gazing up at his boyfriend, who was happily singing along with the end credits for the chosen movie. Whether he had fallen or Lavi had guided him, it didn’t matter. Kanda’s head was resting in his boyfriend’s lap, a blanket spread out over his body.

  
“… Lavi…” He spoke, sitting up slowly. Lavi helped him up, blinking at him.  
“You okay?”  
“I’m fine…” Kanda replied, rubbing his eye. Still tired, but better. Lavi seemed to know that, and he nodded.  
“Tangled just finished. Want to watch something else, or I could make hamburgers?” Kanda opened his mouth to respond, but once again, his stomach did the talking. He blushed, pressing his lips together. Lavi laughed, kissing Kanda’s forehead. “Hamburgers it is~”

  
He got off the couch, sauntering into the kitchen to start making their late lunch. It was almost 4, so maybe it would be more like a dinner. Lavi was getting a bowl out of the cabinet when Kanda limped in.  
“Can I help?” He offered, leaning against the counter.  
“Normally, I’d say yes…” Lavi frowned at him, folding his arms over his chest. “But you should stay off that foot, it doesn’t look pleasant.” Kanda sighed, sitting on a stool.  
“Fine…” Lavi was surprised by that, he’d expected an argument. Maybe Kanda was more tired than he let on. He shook his head, focusing on making their meal. Of course, he kept an eye on Kanda the whole time. His boyfriend was low energy, his eyelids dropping every few seconds. His shoulders were hunched and tense. Lavi wanted to help, but he knew it was outside of his hands.

  
“Oh, I know I shouldn’t have, but Tiedoll called, and I answered. He’s not going to be home, Daisya is sleeping at his teammates place, and Marie is going out of town for work for a few days.” Lavi said, flipping a burger in the pan. Kanda jerked to attention, blinking. He should be mad at Lavi for answering his phone, but that was an important call, and he was glad someone took it.  
“… Oh… Did you tell him what happened?” Kanda looked at his lap, chewing his lip. He didn’t want Tiedoll to know, the old man thought he’d put that behind him. He believed Kanda hadn’t had night terrors about it in years, even. That’s how Kanda wanted it though.

  
“No… Should I have?” Lavi tried to meet Kanda’s gaze, but he avoided it.  
“No. He’d rush home immediately, and probably stick me back in…” Kanda trailed off, shaking his head. That really wasn’t something he wanted to share. Lavi had the good sense to realize that.  
“Okay…” The red-head wasn’t going to pry. He left the words hang in the air, finishing up the burgers before handing Kanda a plate.  
He’d barely managed to settle down before Kanda had polished off the first of the two hamburgers Lavi had made. Clearly, Kanda was hungry. Lavi ate a little bit slower, watching his boyfriend through his bangs.

  
“… Do you want to stay over till they get home…?” His voice shook a little, and Lavi raised his eyebrow.  
“I’d have to check if Gramps has work for me…”  
“Oh… Ya…”  
“But… If not, I’d love to.” He didn’t think the invitation had anything to do with their relationship. Lavi chewed his burger as he thought, studying Kanda. It was clear on the black-haired teens face: he didn’t want to- no, he couldn’t be alone after that. The other seemed to be so used to being alone. He wanted to know everything that had ever happened to him, before that orphanage, and after. Kanda sighed, relieved. Lavi couldn’t help himself, he reached out, pulling Kanda into a kiss, pressing against him. “I’m not going to leave you.” He muttered, resting his forehead against the other’s. Kanda’s eyes searched his before he relaxed slightly, a smile pulling at his lips.  
“Thanks…” The word wasn’t easy for him, but he meant it, and Lavi could hear it.

  
“Are you done with your plate? I’ll clean up. Want to watch another movie?” Lavi pulled away, gathering up Kanda and his plates, taking them to the sink.  
“What do you want to do?” Kanda asked, raising an eyebrow. Lavi glanced over his shoulder, clearing his throat. What he wanted to do… Well. He’d just lie.  
“I don’t care. There was a movie out there that looked interesting. Second Hand Lions I think.” Kanda’s expression didn’t change at all.  
“That is a good one. But you need to call your gramps first, right?”  
“Oh… Ya, I should. Let me do that real quick. I’ll be right back!” Lavi hurried off, his phone in the living room. It didn’t take long, and he left his phone on the coffee table.

“Alright, we’re clear! Gramps won’t need me till next week, so he doesn’t care!” Kanda blushed lightly, rolling his eyes.  
“Well, that’s good…” Kanda didn’t want to admit how happy that made him. Lavi smirked knowingly, striding over, taking Kanda’s chin in his hand.  
“Just good?” He asked, looking down at his boyfriend.  
“… It’s great…” Kanda replied, stretching up towards Lavi. Lavi hummed in amusement, leaning down and meeting Kanda’s lips, pulling the other against him. Kanda molded himself against his boyfriend, standing up on one foot, his arms winding around the red-head’s slender hips.

  
Lavi broke the kiss, trailing his lips along Kanda’s jawline, nuzzling into the dark hair. Kanda buried his face into the red-head’s shoulder, his cheeks flaming.  
“I love you, Kanda.” Lavi whispered, his breath warm against Kanda’s neck. His only response was a small squeak from Kanda.

  
They stood like that for a long while, the silence a blanket over their forms. Kanda was the first to release his hold.  
“Should we get to that movie now…?” He muttered, his face still red, refusing to look at Lavi. Lavi ran his knuckles over Kanda’s cheekbone, smiling.  
“Yes, let’s. Let me help you out there.” There was no argument, no hesitation, Kanda simply looped his arm over Lavi’s shoulder, leaning into him.

  
Lavi, however, had other ideas. He swept Kanda’s legs out from under him, one arm wrapping around his back, picking him up.  
“Ah!” Kanda blinked in confusion, clinging to Lavi’s neck. “Wha-?”  
“It works better~” Lavi chirped, carrying Kanda into the living room to watch the second movie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AO3 formating is so weird...


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ayeeeeee so there's a tiny bit of badly written smut in here *shrug emoji* Just a blow job, really, so I mean, it's whatever *shrug emoji*

Kanda wasn’t used to sharing a bed, and he wasn’t sure he minded that much. At least, not with Lavi anyways. They hadn’t finished the movie- not that either had been paying attention- they had instead moved up to Kanda’s room. The excuse had been that he was tired, and ready to sleep. The reality had been the living room felt too open.  
“Kanda… Never cut your hair…” Lavi breathed out, his lips trailing along Kanda’s neck, sucking and nipping at the tender flesh there. His fingers were tangled in the long strands, pulling gently. 

“Wouldn’t dream of it…” He muttered, breath hitching as Lavi’s lips found a particularly sensitive spot. Kanda’s hands burrowed up Lavi’s shirt, his nails lightly dragging along the skin of his back. Lavi’s spine arched up into his hands, and he drew in a breath, nipping at the point of Kanda’s shoulder. Kanda let out a small moan, his head tilted to the side, eyes closed. It was the most relaxed Kanda had been all day. 

Lavi slid his free hand up Kanda’s shirt, tracing circles along his spine. Kanda shivered at the touch, pressing against Lavi’s chest. Both the teen’s pants were getting tight. Lavi gently tugged Kanda’s shirt up and off, baring the other’s chest, his hand untangling from Kanda’s long hair. Lavi slid his hand down Kanda’s chest, wrapping around to tug at his belt loop. The black-haired boy’s breath hitched in his throat and he made a small noise, stilling Lavi’s hand. “Okay…” Lavi muttered against his boyfriend’s shoulder, kissing the scar there. He wouldn’t do anything Kanda didn’t want him to.  
Kanda pulled at Lavi’s shirt, trying to get it off. Lavi had seen him in nothing but boxers, but he’d never seen Lavi in anything less than shirt and lifeguard suit. Lavi got the hint and pulled back, stripping his shirt off and tossing it across the room. The boyfriends’ eyes took in each other, Kanda sucking in a breath of admiration. Kanda gently placed a hand against Lavi’s side where there was a large scar, and Lavi leaned in to kiss the gunshot scar over Kanda’s heart. 

“You’re beautiful…” Lavi breathed out, kissing the scar on Kanda’s shoulder. “How did I get so lucky?” Kanda huffed, putting his palms on Lavi’s cheeks, bringing his face to his.  
“That’s my line…” Kanda grumbled, his face flaming red. Lavi laughed, pulling Kanda closer.  
“Fine, how did we get so lucky?” He asked, pressing his lips against his boyfriend’s. Kanda’s body molded against him, echoing Lavi’s sentiment. When they pulled apart, Kanda rested his forehead against Lavi’s shoulder, a yawn escaping him. He was so tired, but he didn’t want this to end. The red-head noticed the yawn and ran a hand through Kanda’s hair. 

“You need to sleep.”  
“I don’t want to…” Lavi hummed, amused.  
“Of course not… But you need to.” He could feel Kanda’s bulge through his pants, and he knew Kanda could feel his. “How about this, I’ll get rid of this, if you sleep after.” Lavi offered, his hand rubbing against Kanda’s jeans. Kanda groaned, his hips rocking forward. 

“… Fine…” He breathed out, looking away from Lavi. Lavi grinned, scooting back on the bed. He rolled onto his knees, leaning down and kissing Kanda’s stomach. His stomach muscles tensed and he let out a small noise. Kanda was already on his knees, his feet tucked under him. Lavi gripped his hips, holding his steady as he trailed kisses and nips along Kanda’s stomach and chest. Kanda moaned, tangling a hand in the fiery red hair he loved.  
Lavi snorted, his hand sliding over Kanda’s hips to unbutton and zip his pants, tugging them down slightly. The boxers were no problem either, and he rubbed a thumb over Kanda’s bare tip. 

“A-Ah… La… Vi…” Kanda moaned, his eyes half-lidded. Kanda’s response drove all thoughts of going slow out of Lavi’s head and he wrapped his long fingers around Kanda’s shaft, stroking his length. Kanda threw back his head and moaned again. The red-head helped guide Kanda’s body into laying down, making sure he was comfortable, his head between his legs. Kanda’s hand was still tangled in Lavi’s hair, pulling gently. Lavi didn’t mind.  
He ran his tongue along Kanda’s length, enjoying the sounds his boyfriend was making. Pre-cum had started to leak out of Kanda’s erection, and it only made Lavi feel hotter. The red-head licked the tip again, running his nail over Kanda’s stomach. Kanda’s muscles flexed and he moaned, tugging at Lavi’s hair. He took the tip into his mouth, flicking his tongue over it as he pulled more in. 

If he thought Kanda’s moans were hot, he wasn’t prepared for the noises he made now. Lavi held Kanda’s hips still, alternating sucking and moving his lips farther down the black-haired teens length. He’d given blow jobs before, but never had he enjoyed one so much. Lavi didn’t know how much Kanda could take, but he was impressed by how long he’d been going for. It wasn’t like they had spent an hour, maybe 3 minutes most, but it was more than he expected.  
When Kanda finally came, Lavi swallowed it all, backing off Kanda slowly. His boyfriend looked exhausted, his eyelids drooping, his breaths rapid. Lavi moved up alongside him, nuzzling against the side of his neck. 

“Will you sleep now?” He asked quietly as Kanda shifted to press against him.  
“Mhmmmm…” Even Kanda’s agreeing noise sounded tired. Lavi was conscious of his own hard-on, but he was more worried about taking care of his boyfriend.  
“We’ll shower in the morning, for now, you just need to sleep, okay?” He needn’t even ask. Kanda was down from his high, and he was fading fast, tucking himself against Lavi’s body. The red-head wrapped an arm around his boyfriend, kissing him on the forehead. As soon as Kanda’s breathing steadied, he slipped off the bed, going to the bathroom to jack himself off.

When Lavi finished, he gently removed Kanda’s pants and boxers, draping them over the chair before getting the blankets out from under him. He stripped himself down and crawled under the covers, cuddling up to his sleeping boyfriend. Lavi marveled at how peaceful Kanda looked when he slept. Someday, he’d get him to wear that expression forever. For now, he’d settle on falling asleep to it.


	24. Chapter 24

Morning came way too soon… Kanda’s body was sore, but that wasn’t unusual after an episode. What was unusual, however, was the still snoozing red-head cuddled against his back. Kanda wiggled his body over till he was facing Lavi, taking in his sleeping face. His expression was joy and freedom, a mixture of innocence and foolishness. Kanda decided at once that he loved it. The familiar feeling of nerves started in his stomach. The night came back in bits and pieces.   
By the time Lavi blinked his eye open, Kanda had pulled himself out of bed, showered, and dressed.   
“Mornnniiinnnggggg~” Lavi yawned, stretching his arms over his head. Kanda couldn’t help but stare, his face turning red. He remembered exactly what they’d done, why was he getting embarrassed now?   
“… Morning…” Kanda muttered, finally pulling his gaze away as Lavi got out of bed. “I was just about to go make breakfast…” Lavi was in the process of pulling his pants on, but paused, his stomach growling.   
“That would be great! I’ll help!” As soon as his shirt was on, Lavi strode over to Kanda, leaning in and kissing him on the forehead. “How’s that foot doing?”   
“Foot…? Oh! Oh… It’s fine, it no longer hurts even.” Considering he wasn’t putting any weight on it, Lavi knew Kanda was lying, but he just rolled his eyes.   
“Alright, weeeeeellllllllllllllllllllllllll… Tell me if it starts hurting?” The red-head held out his hand, tilting his head at Kanda. After only the barest moment’s hesitation, Kanda took Lavi’s hand, a small smile toying at his lips.   
“Fine.” It was a reluctant agreement, but he’d honor it.   
They made slow progress, with Kanda limping, down the stairs to the kitchen. He sat for a moment, grimacing at the throbbing in his foot. Lavi, knowing his concern would irritate Kanda, set to raiding the fridge, finding everything he could to make them a good breakfast. 

15 minutes later, Lavi and Kanda settled on the couch in front of the tv, plates in hand. Lavi had made them eggs, sausage, and toast with jam. Nothing overly fancy, but it was enough for the both of them. They ate in relative silence, both just thinking. Kanda had turned on the tv, unfortunately there wasn’t much on tv on a Sunday morning.   
“When’s the race thing again?” Lavi asked around a mouthful of toast, glancing at Kanda.   
“Thursday, I think…” Kanda answered, pulling his knees up to his chest and resting his plate on them. He was huddled in the corner of the couch, a tragic change from last night, Lavi thought.   
“… We should pull out.” Lavi announced, setting his plate aside as he popped the last of his toast in his mouth.   
“What? No! Why would we do that?” Kanda’s plate nearly fell off his knees as he jerked more upright, and he set it on the table. He’d barely eaten anything, half a sausage and a small nibble of toast.   
“Your foot.” Lavi nodded to the offending limb, and Kanda glared at it, as if his glare alone could heal the gash.   
“It’ll be fine by then.” Kanda argued, gently prodding the wrap around his foot. He flinched. It still hurt like hell, but he really hoped Lavi didn’t know that… Of course, the red-head was trained in observation, he noticed everything. That was maddening.   
“Not likely… Foot injuries like that take forever to heal, and since we have school all week, you can’t really rest it…” Lavi chewed his lip, thinking. He frowned at Kanda’s plate, but decided that would be a later fight.   
“Compromise. You can withdraw up until Wednesday at noon. If… Come Wednesday morning… My foot isn’t healed, we’ll drop.” Kanda was careful to avoid admitting any pain or problems. Lavi sighed.   
“Alright, fine, that’ll have to do… But you better be honest when it comes to it.” Kanda leaned his head back, closing his eyes.   
“I will be.” Kanda was being honest then. He’d tell Lavi the truth, if he could do the race or not. Until then, he would still plan on doing it, and Kanda could tell Lavi planned on it too. 

“Okay… Well… What do you want to do today?” Lavi grinned brightly, stretching his arms up above his head. Kanda frowned, pressing his face against his knees.   
“I dunno.” He mumbled through his limbs. “Staying in and watching movies sounds boring, but…” He trailed off, narrowing his eyes at the wall. Lavi’s grin slipped away, and he moved towards his boyfriend.   
“Hey, we don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to… I’m fine just staying in, if that’s what you want to do.” Lavi put a hand on Kanda’s arm, frowning when the black-haired teen flinched slightly.   
“It’s not… I don’t know what I want to do.” Lavi got it then, Kanda was both tired and restless. His flashback yesterday screwed with him, even now. He both wanted to be alone, and yet he couldn’t be alone.   
“Okay, well… How about we watch a movie and then see how you feel?” Lavi smiled, sliding his hand into Kanda’s.   
“… Okay…” The black-haired teen agreed, squeezing his boyfriend’s hand. Lavi leaned in, kissing Kanda’s forehead, before sliding away and headed to the movie shelf. It didn’t take long for him to find a movie, and he loped to the tv, putting the disk in the DVD player. As soon as that was done, he flopped back down onto the couch, taking Kanda’s hand again. Lavi grabbed the remote, flicking the TV on and skipping the previews and starting the movie. Tarzan, a good choice for a calming movie.   
As the movie progressed, Kanda uncurled, pressing himself into Lavi. Despite his desire to not seem needy, his body craved physical contact, and he was too tired to turn that down. Lavi held his boyfriend, running his hand in circles over the other’s hip, humming lightly. Kanda spent the better part of 15 minutes fighting to keep his eyes open, while Lavi ran a hand gently over his back. Eventually, Kanda caved, and he seemed to melt into Lavi, his eyes closed. It wasn’t that he wanted to sleep, more that he didn’t have the energy to keep himself tense. 

The red-head didn’t mind, his arms wrapped around the black-haired teen. They didn’t talk, just listened to the movie. Kanda seemed to be recharging, in a way. When the ending credits rolled around, Kanda shook himself out of his stupor, sitting up and rubbing his face. Lavi watched him carefully, furrowing his eyebrow.   
“I’m fine.” He sounded better, more sure of himself. “Stop staring, I’m not going to just vanish…” Lavi snorted, scooting off the couch and retrieving the DVD, putting it back in its case and shoving the slim case back into the shelf.   
“Okay, Yuu.” Kanda stiffened, his mouth pulling down into a frown.   
“Don’t call me that.” It was the first time Lavi had heard Kanda’s opposition to his name.   
“What, you’re name?”   
“Kanda’s my name.” Lavi frowned, putting his hands on his hips.   
“But Tiedoll always calls you Yuu?”   
“Because I can’t get him to stop!” Kanda snapped. As soon as the words were out of his mouth, Kanda looked like he regretted his tone. He rubbed his face. “Sorry…”   
“It’s fine… I didn’t mean to upset you.” Lavi crossed over and gently took Kanda’s hand in his own, kissing the black-haired teens knuckles. Kanda just nodded, taking a deep breath. 

“Did… Did you still want to do something…?” Kanda asked hesitantly. Maybe this would be it. Maybe Lavi would decide Kanda was too damaged. It wouldn’t surprise him. His foot throbbed painfully, and he fastened his gaze on it.   
“Whatever you want to do.” Lavi’s voice was gentle, filled with… What, was that love?  
“… Can we go to garden store?” It took a lot for Kanda to even ask that, he only ever went with Marie to get flowers. He wouldn’t even go with Tiedoll.   
“Oh! Of course. Did you need some more for your garden?” Lavi looked around, spotting his keys. He slipped away, releasing Kanda’s hand to grab them. Kanda grunted, his version of saying yes.   
Right as Kanda was getting up, his phone rang. Lavi grabbed it and brought it to him, wrapping an arm around Kanda’s waist to help support him. That foot still hurt, and the black-haired teen leaned into the red-head. The caller was Tiedoll. Kanda puffed out his cheeks before sighing. 

“Hey.” Kanda answered, sounding like his usual grumpy self.   
Yuu! How are you? Okay, that was a loaded question. Tiedoll knew something.   
“I’m fine. Why? I thought you were off painting or something.” His voice cracked on the word painting as he shifted his weight onto his injured foot.   
I was… But I heard on the radio that Chang was being demolished. It made me worry… It made me worry about you, Yuu. Oh. So that’s what this was about. Based on Lavi’s shoulder’s stiffening, he could hear Tiedoll. Not good. Kanda was pinned between a rock and a hard place.   
“Oh, ya, I heard about that…” He trailed off, realizing his tone said more than enough.   
I’m coming home Yuu. I’ll be there in an hour and a half.   
“Lavi and I are going shopping.” Kanda blurted before Tiedoll could hang up.   
Then I will see you when we both get home. Please come home alone. Say hi to Lavi. And just like that, Tiedoll hung up. Kanda nearly dropped the phone, biting the inside of his cheek. He felt tears prick at his eyes, and he hung his head. Tiedoll was never that curt. Not unless he was mad.   
“… Did you still want to go…?” Lavi asked gently, pulling his boyfriend against his chest. Kanda swallowed down his emotions, nodding.   
“Ya…” He pushed away slightly, limping towards the front door, Lavi supporting him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ooooooooohhhhhhhhhhh Tiedoll's maaaaaaaadddddddddd rifp Kanda you will be missed <3


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to add another chapter in before Tiedoll lmfao I love these nerds I'm very tired (it's 2 am)

Kanda didn’t let Lavi help him limp through the store. Lavi hung back, grimacing while Kanda glowered at the ground. He was obviously in pain, but he didn’t want anyone to see him weak. That was his logic, and Lavi respected his boyfriend enough to leave it. The red-head did, however, carry everything and push their cart along.   
They spent most of an hour there. Kanda inspected almost all of the flowers he wanted, before picking a specific pot. He ended up buying a butterfly bush, a pot of blue daisies, and a pot of red spider lilies. The entire trip, the two kept a string of endless chatter, talking about little things. Kanda talked a lot about flowers, and the superstitions surrounding certain blooms. Lavi soaked it all in, loving the way Kanda’s face lit up when he talked about flowers.   
After they checked out, Lavi decided it was time for lunch. They swung through a fast food place, getting a couple of sandwiches. Lavi parked the Mustang in the shade of a large tree a couple blocks from their houses so they could eat.   
“Are you going to be okay?” Lavi asked suddenly, right as Kanda took a bite of his sandwich. He nearly choked, managing to get his bite down.   
“What?” Kanda avoided Lavi’s gaze, choosing instead to poke at the lettuce in his bun.   
“Tiedoll. He sounded upset. Is everything going to be okay?” Lavi watched Kanda’s face closely. He didn’t miss the pain, fear, or shame that flickered across his boyfriend’s face.   
“… Most likely… He’s probably just mad I didn’t tell him about the orphanage…” He didn’t sound very sure, but Lavi just sighed.   
“Well… I’ll drop you off at home, and then you’ll text me when you’ve talked to him, right?”   
“Ya, ya, duh.” Kanda took a bite of his sandwich, despite the fact he suddenly looked like he’d be ill. “Only… Just drop me off… I’ll get the flowers from you later…” Lavi blinked. That was probably the strangest request he’d ever gotten from Kanda.   
“Um…” He was going to argue, but Kanda shot him a look. “… Okay… I’ll make sure they don’t die…” Kanda nodded gratefully. The timer on his phone went off. It was time for him to go home, Tiedoll should be there.


	26. Chapter 26

The door clicked shut softly, but it was loud in the dead silence in the house. Kanda leaned against the hard wood, breathing through his nose. His foot was on fire. Nonetheless, he limped into the kitchen, pausing when he saw Tiedoll sitting at the table, like a statue.   
“Hi…” He muttered, lurching towards the table. If Tiedoll noticed, he didn’t move to help. “Tiedoll?” Kanda settled into a chair, peering at his foster father, chewing his lip. 

“What did you do to your foot?” Kanda’s shoulders stiffened, and he leaned away from the older man. A lie jumped to his lips, but the look Tiedoll sent him killed it.   
“… I cut it.”   
“How?” Tiedoll’s hands were shaking. Kanda didn’t know why, but he knew he wasn’t going to like this. Thank god nobody else was here to see this.   
“I… Dropped a glass bowl getting batteries for the remote…” He didn’t want to say it at all, but if he had to, he was going to put it off as long as possible. 

“Why?”   
“It slipped?” Kanda’s voice cracked, and Tiedoll peered over the rims of his glasses sternly. “I knocked it out of the cabinet…” Tiedoll continued to stare at him. Kanda squirmed, turning away from his foster father. His foot was still throbbing, so he distracted himself pulling his shoes off.   
“Yuu… You’re not clumsy. You don’t expect me to believe you just dropped a bowl randomly?” Kanda straightened up, looking at his lap. His foot felt a little better without the shoe, but still it hurt. He needed some pain meds, but they were upstairs… 

“It could happen…”   
“Nice try.”   
“… What do you want me to say?”   
“The truth would be a nice start.” Tiedoll was almost growling. It was only the second time Kanda had ever heard him sound that mad. He took a deep breath, steeling his nerves. 

“I heard the news and I…” His voice broke, tears pricking at his eyes again. Damn breakdowns. They always made him emotional. “I flashed back.” His voice was barely more than a whisper, and he felt Tiedoll stiffen across the table.   
“Yuu… You told me you never thought about it. You told me you’d moved on.” He was angry. His anger cut like a sword, made worse by the worry layering his voice. Kanda swiped at his eyes, trying to push the tears back.   
“I lied.” The admission was easier than it should have been. Tiedoll looked stung, his gaze dropped to his hands, folded in his lap. 

“Why? Why would you lie to me about this Yuu?”   
“I’m not crazy.” The words broke what little resolve Kanda had left, and he couldn’t help the tears trailing down his cheeks. Kanda knew Tiedoll thought he was. Hell, sometimes he even thought he was. What kid could destroy their best friend, their “brother”, and walk away sane? No matter how much he tried to be normal, Kanda just. Wasn’t. Tiedoll sucked in a breath, exhaling heavily through his nose.   
“I’ve never said you were, Yuu…” The old man moved closer to Kanda, reaching out to touch his son’s arm. Kanda flinched away. 

“You locked me away.” His voice was quiet, breaking over the words. Tiedoll sighed.   
“I was trying to get you help… Yuu, what you went through--”  
“What I did.” Kanda snarled, glaring up at his foster father, wiping his nose on his sleeve.   
“What you went through,” Tiedoll repeated sternly, staring down at Kanda, “was horrible, and I thought you needed someone to talk to.” Kanda wanted to be mad, but his anger had drained out of him almost the second it had come.   
“I needed a home.” He whispered, standing from his chair, limping a couple steps away. Tiedoll watched him carefully, poised on the edge of his chair, ready to help his son if he needed it. 

“You’ve never told anyone the complete story.” Tiedoll said after a long moment, watching Kanda lean against the kitchen counter. “Yuu, secrets weigh more when held alone.” He rose, crossing to his son. Tiedoll took Kanda’s arm in his hand, forcing the teen to look at him. “I wanted to- I still want to help you.” Kanda met Tiedoll’s gaze for a moment before looking away, clicking his tongue.   
“… I know…” He finally admitted after a long moment. Kanda’s legs were shaking, and Tiedoll guided him back to a chair, forcing the kid to sit.   
“So talk.” He ran a hand gently over Kanda’s shoulder, following the red scar running across his skin. Tiedoll knew it well.   
“I don’t want to revisit it…” It took more energy to admit that than Kanda had. He let his shoulders sag, his head falling gently to the table. Tiedoll put a gentle hand on the back of Kanda’s head as he sat in the chair beside him. 

“You’re here, in the kitchen. Talking about it won’t bring you back there. You’ll still be here, with me, in our kitchen. Yuu, please.” Tiedoll was pleading, his hand smoothing Kanda’s hair.   
“… I can’t…”   
“I understand.” Tiedoll sighed, watching Kanda’s shoulders jerk and shudder. They both were trying not to cry. Tiedoll was doing significantly better in that front, however. “Yuu, can I get a promise?”   
“… Maybe?” Kanda hated the way he sounded, his throat tight with emotion. 

“You talk to me whenever this happens.” Tiedoll pushed Kanda’s shoulder, making him look up at him. The old man reached out, running a calloused thumb over his son’s cheek, wiping away tears and smiling sadly at him. “You’re not as alone as you want to think you are son.” The teen held his father’s gaze for a while before finally nodding, breaking the contact.   
“Alright, fine, Dad…” It wasn’t sarcastic, or snippy, it was said with utmost sincerity. Tiedoll felt his heart break and soar, at the same time. Kanda had called him dad. And yet, the fight seemed to be drained out of the teen. It hurt him to see his boy like this.   
“Can I take a look at that foot?” He asked after a long silence, in which Kanda had put his forehead back down against the table. In response, Kanda shifted in his seat, pulling his knee up his chest, so his foot was hovering between them. Tiedoll slid into the next chair down, gently pulling Kanda’s foot to rest on the seat he’d vacated, so the teen’s leg was straight. 

Kanda rolled his head, shifting in the chair to make it easier on them. He watched his father carefully unwind the bandages, wincing as they pulled at the thick scab that had formed over the bottom of his foot. Tiedoll frowned at it, tilting his head.   
“It’s not as bad as it looks…” Kanda lied. Tiedoll barely spared him a glance, retrieving a bundle of wet paper towels to clean off the blood.   
“It’s worse, actually.” Tiedoll poked at the cut gently, holding Kanda’s ankle as he tried to retract his foot, hissing in pain. “We’re going to the hospital to get this stitched up.” Kanda groaned internally. Just what he wanted, another hospital trip…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How does one write? You would not believe how much trouble I have keeping track of what I've already posted like wow. Why is it so hard? I'm just. Wow. Okay ya, anyways, drama! *jazz hands*


	27. Chapter 27

Kanda was doped up on pain killers, his foot wrapped neatly, fresh stitches in his cut. He’d been given a crutch to help him around, and the doctor gave Tiedoll orders to keep him off that foot as much as possible for a week. That mean no Senior event. He barely managed to get a coherent text to Lavi. Of course, Lavi showed up at his house in response. Tiedoll was still angry, with both of them, and barely said two words to the red-head. He just let him in and stalked away. Lavi didn’t waste much time thinking about that before he was up the stairs (two at a time, the overachiever) and in Kanda’s room. 

Kanda, of course, was spread out on his bed, the crutch discarded on the floor beside the bed. He had his eyes closed, and he was humming, earbuds blasting away in his ears. Lavi sighed, seeing him in one piece. He walked over to the bed, sitting down on the corner of it. Kanda’s eyes flew open, and he pulled the earbuds out. 

“Hi.” Kanda said stupidly, rolling onto his side to make more room for Lavi. Lavi, of course, took full advantage of this and lay down beside his boyfriend, knocking their foreheads together gently.   
“Hey. You lived.” His tone was light, and he gently brushed some of Kanda’s hair out of his face.   
“I guess.” Kanda sighed, tucking himself against Lavi’s body. He was tired, and on pain meds. He craved human contact and comfort. Lavi nuzzled against his boyfriend’s head, inhaling his scent. 

“Tiedoll’s pissed at me.”   
“I know. He’s mad at me too…” Kanda’s voice was muffled by Lavi’s shoulder. “… Sorry…”   
“For what?” Lavi shifted, gently pulling away from Kanda to look at the other teen’s face. Kanda shook his head, hiding under his bangs. “I don’t care about the senior race, Kanda. I’m not upset. It’s okay.” His voice was low, and he ran his hands through Kanda’s hair. He could see the tension in the other’s shoulders. It was more than usual. 

“I owe you…” Kanda finally muttered, sniffling. He wiped his face, shaking his head as he tried to burrow back against his boyfriend. Lavi let him, draping his arm over the Kanda’s shoulders.   
“No, you don’t. Just get better and we can go back to the gardening store.” Lavi pressed a kiss against Kanda’s forehead. “Maybe we can go on a date too. I know a great place you’d love… It’s a bit of a drive, but trust me, it’s worth it!” Lavi closed his eyes, picturing the last time he’d been to his secret spot. 

“… Let’s go…” Kanda agreed, winding an arm over Lavi’s waist. Lavi grinned, his heart fluttering.   
“We can make a weekend out of it after graduation! Assuming Tiedoll will let us, of course… I might have to sign something from him, to make sure you won’t get hurt though. Oh well, definitely worth it.” Lavi laughed lightly, his chest vibrating against Kanda’s.   
“What else could we do?” Kanda sounded sleepy. “Just keep talking… Please…”   
“You’ll love this place. It’s a place I used to go, years ago. Kinda like a secret place, not even Gramps knows about it. There’s a really clean lake near, maybe 20 minutes away from where I’m thinking. I used to swim there all the time.” Lavi sighed happily, picturing it. As he talked, he felt Kanda relax, his breathing easing. “There’s a tire swing along the coast, it’s been there for at least 15 years, but we can fix it up if we need to. I think you’d enjoy that. It’s pretty secluded there, nobody would be around. I could teach you how to swim and everything…” When Kanda fell asleep completely, Lavi trailed off. He stroked Kanda’s hair, listening to his boyfriend breathing. 

Twenty minutes after Kanda fell asleep, Tiedoll poked his head in. Lavi gently untangled himself from Kanda, sliding off the bed and padding over to Tiedoll.   
“He fell asleep a little while ago. He sounded tired.” Lavi shifted his weight, looking over his shoulder at the black-haired teen.   
“Actually… I wanted to talk to you. I’m making tea, if you’d like some…” Tiedoll watched his son for a long moment before smiling sadly at Lavi. At a nod, Tiedoll turned and trotted down the stairs. Lavi gently closed the door and followed.   
“If this is about me not telling, I’m sorry. It wasn’t my thing to tell, and I didn’t want to hurt him like that.” Lavi’s words rushed out as he stared into the teacup he’d been handed. Tiedoll held up a hand, silencing him. 

“It’s okay. I understand, don’t worry. I know how he is. I’m glad he has someone like you who respects him enough…” Tiedoll drew in a deep breath, setting his teacup down and pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “I actually wanted to talk to you about the orphanage.” Lavi froze, his nervous energy stilled.   
“What about it?”   
“Kanda told me, he told you something of it. I wanted to know what he told you.” Tiedoll tilted his head to the side, his expression sad. Lavi hesitated. If Kanda had told Tiedoll, would it be going behind his back to tell him…? No, probably not.   
“He told me about the twins, and how it was a last chance place, and he’d been adopted and then returned. Same with them. He told me Karma went crazy and the Chang’s had a sword collection. Karma raiding it and just… Attacked everyone.” Tiedoll nodded along with his words, sighing. 

“And that he’s the one who stopped Karma?” Lavi nodded. “That’s about all he would tell me as well…” Tiedoll was hesitating now, chewing the inside of his cheek. So, that’s where Kanda gets that habit, Lavi thought. It was almost amusing, how Kanda pretended to hate Tiedoll, and yet had so many of his small quirks. But Tiedoll’s demeaner froze Lavi’s humour. Something wasn’t right.   
“But…?” 

“He never told me this specifically, or on purpose, but I think he hallucinates. There were flowers found on the scene, he was covered in them, so was Karma. I think he sees them whenever he gets upset, sometimes with Karma…” Lavi frowned, studying Tiedoll. It hurt the older man to share this, since Kanda hadn’t necessarily shared it with him in the first place. “Once, shortly after I brought him home, he had an episode, and he was apologizing to Karma. For what he did to him, but also for abandoning him. It sounded like they’d had a plan, and Yuu believes he abandoned Karma…” Lavi let that sink in. Kanda, having been part of the slaughter? He didn’t believe it. And yet… With how Kanda acted about the whole thing… Maybe. Lavi picked at his nails, frowning at his tea. 

“Which means… Kanda was supposed to have been helping Karma kill everyone…?” Lavi didn’t even blink. His words were cautious, and he twitched as he heard a creak on the stairs.   
“I’m not sure… But that’s what it sounded like. I hope it’s not that.” Tiedoll paused, his fingers drumming against his cup. “Shortly after I heard him say that, I started him in a therapy program, but he shut down…”   
“And you had him committed.” Lavi finished the trailed off thought. Tiedoll blinked at him, shocked. “He mentioned something about not wanting you to know so you didn’t stick him back somewhere.” Tiedoll’s eyes flashed and he lowered his gaze, hurt. Lavi reached out, putting his hand on Tiedoll’s wrist. “You did it to try to help him, don’t feel bad. He’s just… Kanda…” Tiedoll met Lavi’s gaze, sighing. 

“Yuu is a tough nut to crack, but he’s a good kid. He really likes you, and he trusts you more than anything. When he first came to us, Daisya had a bunk bed. I figured they would be able to bunk together, but Yuu… Didn’t. Daisya told me after a couple weeks that Yuu wouldn’t sleep, and when he did, he’d panic himself back awake. I’ve never seen him sleep with anyone else in the room.” Lavi drew his hand back, tilting his head to the side.   
“Why are you telling me this?” Lavi had his suspicions, but he wanted Tiedoll to say it.   
“Because, I like you. I approve of you.” Tiedoll said it so easily, leaning back in his chair to peer at the teen. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen him this happy, or trust someone so much. Lavi, Yuu wanted to do that senior event more than anything, just to compete with you, just to make you happy. He lets you garden with him, and trusts you with his flowers.” 

“… I… Didn’t realize any of this meant that much…” Lavi muttered, toying with the edge of his shirt.   
“He’s opened up to you. Maybe… Maybe you can get him to open up completely. Maybe you can learn everything that happened and help him heal.”   
“When he wants to talk about it, he will. Whether to me or you, he’ll talk. He loves you, Tiedoll. Even if he doesn’t say it, Kanda really loves you. He was scared when he knew you were mad. He felt bad for not telling you, and he was scared of what you might say.” Tiedoll sat in stunned silence for a long moment. Finally, he reached up, wiping tears off his cheeks.   
“Thank you, Lavi. Thank you for being with him, and for your words.” Lavi stood, intending to go back upstairs to check on Kanda. Tiedoll pulled Lavi into a tight hug, crying against his shoulder. Lavi hugged him back, feeling a fondness for his boyfriend’s old father. After, Lavi trotted back to Kanda’s room, happy and calm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I need to figure out a way to end this fic but do I end it happily or with pain and anguish that is the question


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is lame I'm so sorry

“So, I talked to Tiedoll…” Kanda leaned his head against Lavi’s shoulder. It was race day, but here they were, sitting on Kanda’s couch.   
“About…?”   
“That trip.” Lavi blinked, peering down at Kanda.   
“And?”   
“He said yes. He thinks he might have a tent for us too, unless you wanted to rent a hotel.” Lavi smiled brightly, resting his cheek against the top of his boyfriend’s head.   
“You remembered…” Lavi was surprised by that. Kanda had been pretty out of it, high off of pain killers. “I didn’t really consider it. I guess a tent would be better, since there’s a really nice camping spot there. Gramps sold our tent when we moved away from there.” Kanda hummed lightly, pulling his knees up next to his chest.   
“I’ll tell him yes then… Let’s go the weekend after graduation.” Lavi arched his eyebrow, taking Kanda’s hand in his own.   
“That’s in a week and a half, are you going to be ready?” Lavi asked, rubbing Kanda’s knuckles with his thumb.   
“I think so. The doctor seems to think so, too. He gave me the all clear for graduation.” The previous day, Kanda had gone in for a follow up, and the doctor had been thrilled with how his foot was healing. Of course, Kanda always healed faster than normal, so of course his foot did too.   
“Well, then let’s plan on it! The drive is about 5 hours, so we can leave the night of graduation and then sleep when we get there, and then start the weekend there?”   
“That sounds fine by me.” Kanda nodded, pressing his shoulder against his boyfriends. Lavi laughed gently, leaning back into his boyfriend. They lapsed into a comfortable silence, their focus on the cartoons on the tv. 

 

Tiedoll and Daisya got home from the event later in the day. Daisya loped in the front door, parading his first-place award around. Tiedoll had a cake, and the biggest grin Lavi had ever seen on the old man’s face. Kanda tripped Daisya with his crutch as he pranced by, sending him flying into a chair.   
“Yuu!” Tiedoll frowned, putting the hand not carrying the cake on his hip.   
“It’s his fault.” Kanda whined. “He wasn’t watching where he was going.” He stood, using the crutch to pull himself up. His foot may be nearly healed, but it still hurt to put weight on. Lavi rose too, rolling his eye.   
“Yuu, you’re mean!” Daisya pouted, bouncing back up and loping away. Kanda ground his teeth together.   
“Don’t call me that.”   
“Come on, let’s have some cake!” Tiedoll interrupted, knowing the fight that was about to ensue between the brothers. Daisya skipped away to the kitchen, chanting “We are the Champions!” loudly. Lavi arched his eyebrow, shaking his head. Kanda sighed and limped towards the kitchen, pulling Lavi along. 

 

They ate cake and Daisya bragged about his victory. Tiedoll kept the peace between Kanda and Daisya, and Lavi watched, entertained.   
Too soon, it was over. Lavi had to go home, and Tiedoll was sending Kanda to bed. Daisya didn’t last long, conking out almost immediately. Kanda settled into his bed, burying himself into his book.   
“Yuu… Sleep.” Tiedoll sat on the edge of the bed, peering at Kanda over the edge of his glasses. He did that a lot, peering. It was always slightly unnerving.   
“Just a couple of chapters…” Kanda grumbled, blinking at his foster father. “Something’s gonna happen soon.”   
“Yuu, no, go to sleep.” Tiedoll gently took the book out of Kanda’s hands, closing it and holding it close to his chest. “I know you haven’t been sleeping.” He looked away from his father, his bangs falling over his eyes.   
“I’ve just been distracted…” He muttered, folding his arms over his chest. Tiedoll snorted, rolling his eyes.   
“I told you to talk to me when things are going on. So, talk.” Kanda leaned his head back, looking at the stars on his ceiling.   
“There’s not much to say… It’s just that…” He hesitated, thinking. Tiedoll watched him carefully, arching one bushy eyebrow. “Alma and Karma’s 20th birthday just passed…” The words deflated him. Tiedoll’s expression softened and he reached out, putting a hand on Kanda’s scarred shoulder.   
“Yuu, none of it is your fault. You did what you had to do.” Kanda shrugged his hand off, swinging his legs out of his bed.   
“Ya, ya, I know, I had to kill my friend to save myself and avenge the other kids. I had to destroy him just to walk out of there. I know all that, I’ve heard it more times than I care to have… It’s just… Hard sometimes.” He sounded tired, and the bags were clearly visible under his eyes. Kanda’s face was pale. Tiedoll’s heart ached. This kid had been through enough, why wouldn’t the world just go easy on him?   
“You’re my son. Please, just promise me you’ll talk to me when it feels like this. I don’t know what I can do to help, but I want to know, okay?” Tiedoll’s voice was soft, and he held Kanda’s book out.   
“… Alright… Sorry… Dad.” The word felt awkward and clumsy on his lips, but he was sincere as he shifted in his bed, taking the book back. “Now can I just read a couple of chapters?”   
“I’ll check on you in an hour, you better be done by then.” Kanda huffed, rolling his eyes. He agreed to Tiedoll’s terms and shooed him out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter things heat up lmfao


End file.
